


Three to Tango

by MayGlenn



Series: No "I" in Threesome [1]
Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Aliens, BDSM, Big Damn Hero Michael Guerin, Canon Compliant, Canon Disabled Character, Canon-Typical Vomiting, Dom/sub, Domestic Fluff, Edgeplay, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Forced Orgasm, Handwaving Physics, Hurt/Comfort, Kink Negotiation, Light Angst, M/M, Michael "I Don't Know What A Hug Is" Guerin, Michael Guerin Needs a Hug, Multi, Multiple Orgasms, Polyamory Negotiations, Porn With Plot, Road Head, Rope Bondage, Semi-Public Sex, Sex Toys, Spanking, The Nebulous Well Adjusted Future They Make For Themselves, Until Season 2 Starts, Wildly Inaccurate Discussions of Alien Anatomy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-01
Updated: 2020-03-18
Packaged: 2021-02-28 09:49:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 29,994
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22968013
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MayGlenn/pseuds/MayGlenn
Summary: It wasn’t smart to cheat on a psychic.But Michael Guerin wasn’t cheating, exactly...It wasn’t that he was against cheating on principle, but this wasn’t it. The game had glitched, was stacked so that he was winning everything, impossibly, for the first time, his karma reversed and he didn’t even know how it happened himself. It wasn’t even like he was using his powers to get what he wanted—he couldn’t—if his powers worked like that, he would have used them more a long time ago. Michael didn’t have powers that could make people like him. If anything, his powers did the opposite.And he had spent so long disappointed that now he had what he wanted he almost didn’t know what to do with it.
Relationships: Maria DeLuca & Alex Manes, Maria DeLuca/Michael Guerin, Maria DeLuca/Michael Guerin/Alex Manes, Michael Guerin/Alex Manes
Series: No "I" in Threesome [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1667581
Comments: 120
Kudos: 119





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is how I deal with my dissertation.
> 
> Rating will change.

It wasn’t smart to cheat on a psychic. 

But Michael Guerin wasn’t  _ cheating _ , exactly... 

It wasn’t that he was against cheating on principle, but this wasn’t it. The game had glitched, was stacked so that he was winning everything, impossibly, for the first time, his karma reversed and he didn’t even know how it happened himself. It wasn’t even like he was using his powers to get what he wanted—he couldn’t—if his powers worked like that, he would have used them more a long time ago. Michael didn’t have powers that could make people like him. If anything, his powers did the opposite. 

And he had spent so long disappointed that now he had what he wanted he almost didn’t know what to do with it. 

…

He sat there, playing guitar for Maria with his perfect hands, two perfect, whole hands, and Maria knew without him needing to tell her. 

“You’re from outer space,” she blurted out, but then clapped a hand over her mouth. “Oh, God, I’m turning into my mother…” 

Then Michael was there, both supportively at her side and also looming over her. He took her hand, dishwashing-dry, and kissed it. “You’re not. Or, you are, but only in all the good ways. You’re…right.”

She looked at him, reading him openly, now, because he was letting her.  _ Inviting  _ her. 

“I’m the last to know.” 

Michael grinned, looking giddy with relief, though she couldn’t tell why. “Not  _ the  _ last.” 

She hit his arm, softly. He still flinched like she had slugged him, like he wanted to make her feel stronger, and she rubbed his arm. 

“Guerin…” she said, and then sighed. “Max and Isobel, too, then? That’s why they found you, like that, when we were kids?” 

“Yeah. I’ll show you the pods sometime.” 

Somehow, this wasn’t what was important in his head, and she winced, but felt like she needed to go there. “You…love Alex.” 

At that, Michael looked away, shrank down, sat on a barstool. His voice was barely above a whisper. “I love  _ you _ , too.”

He sniffed, straightened his shoulders, like he was coming to grips with something. “And you never hurt me. So, I...” 

“God damn it, Michael, of course I’ve hurt you!  _ Everyone  _ has hurt you. You just can’t even recognize it anymore,” Maria said. 

Michael flinched again, but this time, almost imperceptibly. She only noticed it because his aura flinched. He didn’t say anything. 

Slowly Maria reached out, carding her hands through his hair, waiting until his eyes flicked up to look at her. She couldn’t read him unless he was looking at her. “All this time you had... _ power _ . And you let everyone hurt you.” 

He kissed her, then, surging forward, forcing the question, deflecting, and she let him, God, she let him, anything to let him keep a shred of dignity intact to cover himself with. He just felt so naked in front of her now. 

There was a sound at the door, a soft “Oh,” and they looked up too late. 

“Alex—” Michael said.

Because of course it was Alex at the door, trying not to look shocked or hurt.

“Michael,” Alex said. “Maria. I—I’m sorry, I should—”

“Alex, don’t leave,” Maria demanded, sharp. 

Maybe Michael really could read minds, because as though on Maria’s order, the door snapped shut in front of Alex and locked, trapping him in the bar with them. 

“Hey, nice,” Maria said. 

Alex turned around, braced, guarded, on high alert. That was a new stance. 

“We need to talk,” Maria said.

“Not sure what we have to discuss,” Alex said, arms crossed. 

Maria turned deliberately back to Michael, waited until he drew his eyes from Alex to her. “I love  _ him _ , too.” 

Something flashed through Michael’s features, almost breaking. 

“I know,” he said after a few long seconds. 

“Sit,” she said, and grabbed a bottle of tequila and three shot glasses. 

Alex and Michael stared at her. After a moment, they both moved. Alex sat down at a table.

“Don’t waste that.” Michael reached behind the bar. “This is definitely a whiskey problem.” 

… 

They only just sat down when Maria’s phone went off. She ignored it, pouring a round for each of them. Then Michael’s phone buzzed, with an actual phone call. It was Isobel. Michael’s gaze flicked around the table at all three of them, but he sent it to voicemail. 

Then Alex’s phone went off: a text from Kyle. 

“Okay, what—” Maria said, and looked at her phone. Then she stood up. “I have to go.” 

Isobel called Michael’s phone again. “Okay…” he said, and stood up to answer it. 

_ Rosa was alive.  _

_ Max was dead.  _

_ Jesse Manes was in a coma. _

This discussion was going to have to wait. 


	2. Chapter 2

“I’m just here for information,” Michael said, hands up. 

Alex met him at the door to the Project Shepherd bunker with a flicker of something like hope, or else deep concern—Michael wasn’t good at reading facial expressions—crossing his features. Michael was sad to disappoint him either way. 

“Besides, Isobel’s here.” 

“Come on, Michael, I thought the plan was you  _ distract  _ him while I find Sergeant Manes and pull the plug?” Isobel said, with that  _ Mean Girls _ way of “joking” she had, and she pushed through, nearly barrelling Alex over. 

“Be my guest,” Alex offered, emotionless, all military. He was walking with the cane and smelled like he hadn’t showered recently. “You’d be doing me a favor, honestly.” 

Michael gave Isobel a stern look when Alex turned his back, but she ignored it. “What do you have for us?” 

“We got—a lot—from the harddrives,” Alex said. “And it’s not easy to look at. Information about all the crash survivors. But there might be something in there about where you came from, about your powers, how to help Max. It’s just…”

“Buried under reports of how your father tortured my people for seventy years?” Michael said, lips tight. Apparently he couldn’t play this cool. 

“Something like that,” Alex said, face still impassive, though Michael thought—or hoped—he might have hurt him with that last barb. Alex turned away before he could really get a good look.

Isobel shrugged, already reading through the reports. 

“I’ve got these,” she said, drawing them towards her, like maybe she wanted to protect Michael, for once. Maybe she was just desperate to get Max back.

“There’s another thing,” Alex offered, back still turned. 

Michael followed him. He  _ did  _ want to read those reports, but not until he could be alone with his sadness and impotent rage. 

“I, ah, found this at Jim’s cabin…” 

Michael felt like he had been punched when Alex revealed a huge chunk of what he immediately recognized as part of their spacecraft. He moved forward to take it from Alex’s hand, almost smiling, before the thought he should be mad at Alex from keeping this from him. 

Alex didn’t recoil, but held it out, meeting his gaze. 

When Michael actually touched the material, it shocked him with a vision, like if a static electricity charge could give visions. 

It was a memory of Alex, Alex’s memories in Caulfield, talking to his brother, fighting his brother, and—and of his  _ mother _ . He hated how they were tangled up together in his head. Alex, the boy he’d loved for ten years, and his mother, dying in a fiery explosion that was his fault and he couldn’t save her from. 

Michael sucked in a breath, nearly letting it go. 

“Yeah, it, ah, did something weird to me, too, when I touched it. I kinda hung onto it, for a while. I’m sorry,” Alex reported, like he was debriefing him. 

And, maybe because of the vision, or maybe because he was learning to flex his powers, Michael knew what Alex was thinking as they both clutched the piece of the spaceship: __

_ I kept it because I was afraid you were going to use it to leave me _ . 

Michael stared at Alex, trying to decide whether to be touched or furious. In the end, he just let it slide, like it didn’t bother him. Things were easier when he didn’t let them bother him.

“It’s fine. Thanks,” he said, and set it aside to take back to his lab. 

… 

Michael and Isobel pored over the material, dizzy by the end, as they slowly pieced together what Noah hadn’t had a chance to tell them about who they were. They  _ were  _ alien royalty, alright, which made some of Noah’s comments make sense. Not just alien royalty, actually, but  _ clones  _ of alien royalty. 

“So I’m—I was someone called Princess Vilandra, and you’re General Rath,” Isobel said. 

“A General, huh?” Michael asked, chuckling. Laughing was easier than being freaked out by it, anyway. He didn’t feel like a leader, much less a warrior. Clearly the clone  _ could  _ fall far from the tree. 

Michael looked to Alex, who did not look impressed at his laughter. “Does that mean I outrank you, maybe?”

“You’re not a killer,” Alex said, with an odd, squinting finality. “Much less a  _ General _ .” 

“Yeah, well.” Michael leaned back in his chair, all nonchalance. “Maybe I should be. Maybe Noah was right, about our powers…” 

“You’re not a killer, Michael,” Alex repeated. And Michael knew, with a knowledge that settled in his gut like a stone, that Alex knew what a killer looked like. He saw one in the mirror every day, after all. “And Generals are only good at getting other people killed for them.” 

…

“Michael  _ Guerin _ ?” Rosa squealed. “Girl, I thought he was  _ gay _ . Least he got hot.” 

“How the hell did you know that?” Maria accused. “Bi, I think. Or, uh,  _ very  _ good at pretending?”

Rosa’s eyes lit up, and she laughed: “Shut  _ up _ .”

“ _ Oh _ , yeah,” Maria said, wondering what her life was that she was discussing her sex life with a resurrected version of her best friend from 10 years ago. Then she coughed, cleaning a glass. “But he...I don’t know, him and Alex have a...might have a…” 

Rosa had the decency to look alarmed. “ _ Oh _ , shit.”

“Yeah. Oh, shit.” 

“Are you guys doing okay? Hos before bros, Maria, you know that.” Rosa scrunched up her nose. “But I think Alex is probably the bro, and Michael is the ho in this situation. Bros before hos, DeLuca.” 

“I know, I know, we need to talk. All of us. We just—haven’t.” 

“Too bad you can’t threesome your way out of this problem. ‘Member that time you and Alex made out on a dare? The  _ face  _ he made!” 

Maria laughed, too, but this was obviously something that was much funnier to a 19-year-old than a 29-year-old. “Yeah, that was rougher on him than me. Though Alex  _ did  _ always say he’d marry me for the tax breaks if they didn’t legalize gay marriage, but…” 

“Oh my God, they legalized gay marriage?! Shit, I should die again, see what else they come up with.” 

“Yeah...you’re  _ not  _ gonna like who’s president, though…” 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> let's just get that pesky plot out of the way. 
> 
> warning for hand-wavey physics and alien powers.
> 
> OT3 will resume presently.

“I can’t let you guys do this. The way your powers drain you…” Kyle was saying, holding his hands up and standing between Isobel and Max’s body. 

“I-I’m with Kyle on this one, guys, actually. I want Max back, too, this just— It seems a little…” Liz added, uncertainly. 

“Half-cocked?” Michael supplied, wryly. 

But Isobel Evans had A Plan To Save Max, and there was no way anyone was going to stop her. Michael was just along for the ride. 

(You know, like the _General_ he apparently was. Ha.)

“This is going to be like running a marathon, and you don’t even know where the finish line is,” Kyle explained, douchily, the only person here who had run a marathon. “And, ah, people usually train for those.” 

“Well, we don’t have time for that,” Isobel snapped. 

“Your powers _damage your cells_ when you use them too much. Forget puking, I’m worried you might—” 

Whatever Kyle thought might happen to them was cut off as thunder cracked loudly overhead, outside the cave. In the same way Max had defeated Noah, their plan was to harness the storm, and use it to bring Max back, together. 

Michael told himself he didn’t really care except for how Max’s death had affected Isobel and Liz, and if he questioned himself deeper he knew he did want Max back because Max was a good person who could live a happy, fulfilled life, and maybe, just maybe, the alien clone part of Michael was loyal to him as his king. 

Maybe he wanted him back as the kind of half-estranged brother he was.

Meanwhile, Maria and Alex, both briefly so close to him, both or one almost his, had pulled away, leaving a hollow void in his chest. Or maybe he was the one who had pulled away from them, throwing himself into work that didn’t hurt or confuse him. At least he knew that if it came down to it, he could give his life for Max or Isobel and it wouldn’t really be a problem. It might let Maria and Alex be friends again. Tonight was the first time Michael had seen them together since the almost-talk at the Wild Pony. 

“You guys, we’ve got a problem,” Alex said, from the mouth of the cave, and against his better judgment, Michael went with him to look. 

Alex handed him a pair of military-grade night-vision binoculars that were heavy as shit, but allowed him to see the Hum-vee and other vehicles approaching, stuffed with soldiers. 

“Do they know we’re _here_?” 

“They must’ve found out about me!” Rosa said. “Forget ICE, these guys want to know what it was like inside an alien pod!” 

“They might be looking for my dad. Or me,” Alex suggested, a little more rationally. “Either way. I’ll go talk to them, see if I can get them off the scent.” 

“Alex,” Michael pleaded, and more communication passed between their eyes than they’d spoken in the last week. Michael only recognized the look in Alex’s eyes that said he was prepared to die for them because he knew so much about it. 

“I’ll go, too,” Rosa offered, but Maria and Liz each took her hand. “No. Better he deny seeing you.” 

Alex looked in the binoculars again. “They’re executing a standard search pattern. You better get in there and take care of Max fast if you think you can. If they get close, I’ll take care of it.” 

Michael flinched when Isobel took his hand and led him back into the cave. 

… 

And they should have known, of course. Things that usually started out very well for them usually got bad before too long, before they got better, if they ever did. 

Isobel puked again, and there was blood in it now. Michael took a certain pride in keeping the contents of his stomach down this time, but he did drink the acetone Maria offered him. 

Maria’s face was pinched, like she could feel how much pain they were both in, and he hated that. 

“We have to keep going. Why aren’t you trying, Michael?” Isobel shouted at him, and that hurt. Isobel was maybe the last person on Earth who gave a damn about him, and here she was, only caring about him because she _needed_ him. 

The Caulfield files said they were betrothed at one point, not siblings at all, or even cousins. That the whole war that sent them away from Antar and to Earth happened because her clone refused to marry his clone. Maybe her revulsion for him was encoded in her genes. 

Maybe being repulsive was encoded in his. 

_Also_ , now all the lighting being called into this cave was drawing a lot of attention. 

At one point, Alex called Kyle up, and they thought they could hear Sheriff Valenti’s name. They really were running out of time. 

“Okay. Okay, I’m ready. I’m here, I’m trying,” Michael said, and they both laid their hands on Max’s chest and fed life back into him. Energy converting to mass converting back to energy. No wonder it took such an effort, made them so sick. They tried not to be loud, but it took a monumental effort, like lifting a car, and they couldn’t really help screaming with the effort it took, and not really knowing what they were doing. Healing was Max’s shtick. He was the expert. They were just making this up as they went along. 

This time, Michael threw up, scrambling away to dry-heave into a basin that already had puke in it. Smelling it made him hurl again. 

“Isobel?” 

Liz’s voice, full of concern. 

And no answer. 

Michael wheeled around. Isobel was on the ground, eyes open, unmoving. Blood pouring down her nose. 

“I’m not getting a pulse,” Liz said. “Kyle!” 

No answer came from the mouth of the cave. 

“Isobel?” Michael asked, crawling over to her, numb but feeling like he should be worried. “No, no, no, fuck. It’s not supposed to be _you_.” 

Maybe he really wasn’t trying.

"Michael…" Maria warned, but didn’t go any further. Instead, she screwed herself up and marched out. 

There was a pause, and then they heard her say, “Fuck.” 

“Come out with your hands up,” said a voice Michael recognized all too well. Jesse Manes, magnified over a megaphone. 

“Fuck,” he said, and threw up again. 

“What the fuck is he doing out there?” Liz said, shaking but trying not to show it. “I thought—damn it!” 

Liz and Rosa looked at each other. Liz usually had the plans, but right now she was trying to bring Isobel back the old-fashioned way, with CPR. 

Michael got up, taking a bottle of acetone and chugging it as he staggered to the mouth of the cave. Maria was there, hands up, unmoving, except that she was shaking almost imperceptibly. And surrounding them were what looked like hundreds but were probably only a few dozen soldiers, guns trained on them. The Sheriff was there, too, and some new deputy she hired after losing Coleman and Max. 

Alex and Kyle stood among them, hands on their heads, under armed guard. 

“Guerin, Maria, get down!” Alex had the decency to say, but soldiers were already advancing on their position. 

The only thing that made Michael feel slightly better about all this was how shitty Jesse Manes looked, skinny and scraggly with a beard, sitting in a Jeep because he probably still couldn’t walk, after being in a coma for weeks. He still hadn’t thanked Kyle for that, actually. 

The soldiers didn’t reach them, stopping short and bouncing off an invisible brick wall that Michael held up, jew clenching in concentration. Maria glanced at him sidelong, realizing his hands weren’t raised in surrender, but were clenched to fight. 

“Oh right. That’s your power, isn’t it?” 

“It’s, uh. It’s the one I’m best at. I think we all have all the powers, though,” Michael said, through gritted teeth. He had to remember that. He _could_ heal. He _could_ get into people’s minds. 

But he was just _really_ good at walls. 

Maria gaped, felt the tingling in the air around her, watching a faint green shimmer start to form. She had never seen him use his powers before, except for once on the door at the Wild Pony. 

On the other side of the invisible wall, someone shouted for them to get on the ground or they would open fire. Guns raised and cocked. Alex and Kyle and Sheriff Valenti were trying to shout them down. To her credit, Maria didn’t move away from him, or duck, or even flinch. 

“What do you need from me?” she asked. 

“Look away. Please.”

Because Michael had already been doing the math: mapping the trajectory of bullets, warping the force field around him so that every bullet fired would ricochet back and strike a soldier. Warping a protective barrier around Alex, and Kyle, and the Sheriff. Aiming a few extra bullets at Jesse Manes’s head.

That was easy. Maybe physics had always been easy to him because it was part of the art of war where he came from. 

Channelling the energy back into himself so he could still heal Isobel and Max, of course, would be harder. 

“Michael, don’t—” Alex tried once more, but then Manes yelled “ _Fire_!” 

In a quick spray of bullets they were all dead. All of them. 

And Michael drew all those potential lives out like he was siphoning gas for his truck. God, _this_ was easy, too, it turned out. He felt—well, _terrible_ , actually, staring at the field of dead bodies, hearing how Alex and Maria and Kyle—and Liz and Rosa—of course they’d come out to see the show, too—reacted. 

But he also felt powerful. The feeling was...entirely foreign to him. 

And everyone who was still standing looked terrified of him. He’d always been an outsider, but now he was truly an alien. 

Maria touched him first. 

“Michael—” she began, but he brushed her off, going back inside the cave. 

He chugged another bottle of acetone, but it did nothing for him. He didn’t need it. He knelt between Max and Isobel’s bodies. 

“Michael, n-no, you can’t—it’s too much all on your own,” Liz protested, even though it was her boyfriend he was trying to save. 

“Michael—” Alex’s voice this time, and at that Michael actually looked up, watching Alex kneel with effort beside him, on the other side of Isobel. 

Michael couldn’t help himself. He grabbed Alex by the face and kissed him, savagely, selfishly. It wasn’t until he snatched Maria’s hand, too, and tugged her into a kiss as well that he realized he was kissing them for himself for the first time. 

Maria was crying. “Michael, please don’t—”

He didn’t know whether she had been about to say _please don’t hurt me,_ or _please don’t kiss me,_ or _please don’t kill yourself to save them_. It could have been any of them, he supposed. It didn’t really matter. 

The last thing he remembered was laying a hand on Isobel and Max and screaming for them to come back.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> consistent chapter sizes? what are those?

Michael woke choking on his own vomit. 

“Whoa, holy shit!” 

“Sit him up!”

“Here.” 

“I got it. Get—”

“On it.” 

Michael’s brain was flatlined, like snow on an old analog TV, like that noise that came on the radio before flash flood warnings. His body wasn’t doing much better, convulsing and shivering, unsure where he ended and his surroundings began. There were voices, here, voices he _recognized_ , but he couldn’t—he didn’t—know—

Slowly things came into focus. He was leaning against someone’s chest. Someone was wiping up his chin, like a baby. He couldn’t open his eyes for some reason.

“Here, I got some acetone for you, Michael. Unless you’re gonna puke again?” 

“I’ll hold him up.” 

Michael choked. “Al? Alex? Mur—ria?” 

“Yep, it’s us, you’re okay. Think you can drink for me?”

Michael shook his head, but as soon as the bottle touched his lips, his hand came up and he gripped someone’s wrist and gulped, his body knowing what it needed even if he didn’t want it. All at once his eyelids came unglued from each other, and he squinted in the bright light. Couldn’t place where he was, but he could see blurry shapes. The acetone hit his stomach cold, but cleared his head. Next there was water at his lips, and he drank that, too, and that at least made his mouth feel like something hadn’t died in it. He coughed again. 

“Hey, just breathe. You’re okay. That wasn’t much fun, huh?” This was Maria’s voice. 

“Yeah, aspirating on vomit...not the way I wanted to go,” Michael croaked, slapping a hand to his face, rubbing his gummy eyes, gross face, significant stubble. 

Then his brain kicked back online all at once, and Michael surged up, grabbing Maria’s arm, demanding, “M-Max and—Iz? What happened?” 

“Easy,” Alex said, pulling him back against his chest. 

“Yeah, they’re fine, Michael,” Maria said, laying a hand over Michael’s hand. “You did it.” 

God, they were both touching him. It felt— _so good_ being touched by them. He almost didn’t care about anything else. Except, he did care. Max and Isobel were okay. That was good. “Good. Okay. Are they...?” He looked around. 

“Liz and Rosa are with them,” Maria said, her voice and face and everything gentle, and Alex was still holding him, and Max and Iz were alright, and he felt like shit but he was _alive_ and he wasn’t dreaming this time _they were here_. 

Michael blinked, closed his eyes again, trying to process all of this—everything. Now his eyes were brimming with tears. “Why are... _you_...here?” 

No one answered. When he opened his eyes again, Maria and Alex looked confused. Or maybe concerned.

“W-with me?” Michael tried to explain. They didn’t owe him anything. He couldn’t think why they’d want to be here, much less _together_ , with him. He would have expected Max or Isobel to be here, if they really were alive, though he didn’t exactly want to see them right now. 

Alex’s grip tightened around him. “ _Jesus,_ Guerin.” 

“Oh, Michael,” Maria whispered, looking like she was about to cry now, too. 

Michael wondered what he had said wrong, but she only kissed his forehead. 

“Sleep, okay, baby? _We’ll be here_. Both of us.” 

Michael nodded, feeling stupid for missing the point. 

He fought the exhaustion, but got only two blinks in before he passed out: 

The first blink showed him he was in his bunker, his workstation and light fixtures a comforting hum above him. They must’ve moved a bed in. So, that was nice. 

In the second blink he thought he saw something shimmer faintly on Maria’s arm.


	5. Chapter 5

_ “Right. You should blame God. First he makes hangovers, and then half-women half-sharks who won’t even sleep with me. Thanks for nothing, God!”  _

Maria’s cackle shook Michael awake. She sounded close, close enough that Michael could feel her breath through his hair as she laughed. “I forgot how funny this stupid show was.” 

“They’re like, 13 seasons in now,” Alex confirmed. He was also close, close enough that Michael could feel the low vibrations from the sound of his voice. “We should catch up.” 

Michael drifted for a few minutes, just listening. 

_ “So that makes you...a gay robot.”  _

“Ohmygod, Alex, it’s you!” Maria laughed. “You’re the gay robot!” 

“Does that mean you’re the half-woman half-shark?” 

_ “I hate plans. Plans mean we have to do stuff. Can’t we just have a strategy...or a mission statement?” _

“This is just  _ scarily _ what the military is like,” Alex said, awed, but laughing. “It’s...uncanny.” 

Maria reached across him to squeeze Alex’s arm, and that was how Michael realized they were all in the same bed together. At the same time. He was surrounded by them, hemmed in on either side, with  _ both  _ of them, in one  _ bed _ . He had to be dreaming. He had to be dead and somehow in heaven, despite not believing in God. Except heaven probably didn’t…didn’t have... _ Red vs. Blue _ ? 

“Are you guys...using me as a laptop stand?” Michael said, but it came out slurred and quiet, and he had to cough to clear his throat. 

“He’s awake!” Maria cried, lifting the laptop off his stomach. 

“Hey, bring that back. It’s warm,” Michael moaned. He stretched, and kept stretching, and groaned again. Everything ached. He rubbed his eyes and squirmed.

Then arms were helping him up, propping pillows behind him as he blinked slowly awake. 

“Come on, how about sitting up?”

“How you doing? Think you could eat something?”

“Why’re you being so nice to me?” he demanded, rubbing his eyes, still toddler-sleepy. “Together?” 

“We...sort of started the talk without you,” Alex said, brushing his fingers through Michael’s hair. “That’s the short answer. We’ll finish it when you’re more awake. When you’re feeling up to it.”

“Also, you needed someone to be here with you, and we weren’t going to leave you even if we  _ hadn’t  _ talked,” Maria said, glaring vaguely at Alex. 

But Alex wasn’t looking at her. He was leaning over Michael, just staring at him, smiling softly, relaxed. “Yeah, well. That, too.” 

Michael gazed up at Alex, unblinking, almost wary. He wasn’t sure he’d ever seen Alex look so relaxed around him, not since—not since they were teenagers, and—and it was so beautiful it made Michael’s chest clench. 

“ _ Okay _ . Come on, Guerin, you gotta eat something,” Maria said, breaking up the moment and sounding a little mom-ish, but not in a way that Michael found turned him off. Alex sat up, letting him move. “How about some gatorade? Yogurt? Soup?” 

Michael put a hand over his stomach, still way behind this conversation, but his stomach clenched, now, at the idea of food, and his heart, too, at Maria being so  _ nice  _ to him. “I—I’m not—” 

It was just too much, and Michael felt too brittle. 

“How about crackers?” 

“Michael…”

“It’s okay—really, m’fine…” Michael tried squirming away, not at all sure how to respond to all of this, but they were on both sides of him and he couldn’t exactly escape whatever this was. He sat up, leaning forward, covering his face. “Just, I just need a—a minute.” 

He must have looked as close to crying as he felt, which said more about how he was doing than anything else. 

(If he felt any stronger he’d be better at pushing everyone away.) 

“Hey,  _ hey _ ,” Maria said, sliding into the bed with him. “Come here, I’m sorry, you’re okay.” 

She pulled him against her, and he let her, but stiffly. Alex was rubbing his back, his shoulder, and she was petting the back of his neck. “No, it’s—it’s okay, I-I’m sorry, I’m fine,” he said, and a sob burst out before he could stop it. “I—”

“Hey, Michael. It’s okay,” Alex said, from behind him, hands and voice warm. “Everything’s okay.” 

And then Alex got into the bed with him, too, warm all along Michael’s back, and then Michael  _ really  _ started crying, sobbing against Maria’s chest. She wasn’t wearing a bra, just a big, soft T-shirt, and instead of being able to enjoy this, too, he was getting snot all over it. 

“It’s not! I—all those—” 

“You’re not a killer,” Alex whispered against the back of his neck.

“We love you,” Maria said.

That made Michael laugh, wetly. “W-what is this,  _ Invasion of the Body Snatchers _ ? We got enough aliens in this town.” 

A few even breaths and he was just about under control again. 

_ “I wouldn’t say I’m mean. I just get hired to do mean things,”  _ the laptop said from somewhere. 

“Alex, will you turn that off,” Maria said. “I don’t want to miss it.” 

Michael sniffed, trying not to admit to himself how much he missed Alex’s warmth when it was gone. “How long was I out?” 

Maria hummed. “What was it, five days? Liz and Kyle came and checked on you a few times, and Max and Isobel, though they’re on bedrest still, too. You woke up a little bit yesterday, don’t know how much you remember.”

Michael nodded. “You’ve been... _ here _ ?” 

“Well, Maria had to go to work a few times, but yeah. We didn’t think you should be alone.” Alex said, returning to bed, the laptop quiet. Michael was trying not to admit how good his weight on the bed behind him felt, how good his hand on his back felt. “You really should try to get up today, move around, eat something.” 

Michael nodded. He was still curled against Maria, like he imagined it would be like to be a child curled up against his mother, though he had no memories of anything like that (maybe it was like being curled up in the pod?). He felt safe, and wasn’t ready to move yet. 

“...What’d you guys talk about?” 

“Nothing,” Alex said, while Maria said, “Everything,” and then they both laughed. 

Maria scratched the back of Michael’s neck. “I reminded him of our pact that if either of us ever dated Heath Ledger, we would have to share him.” 

“That was  _ not  _ the key conversation,” Alex said, like he was already tired of arguing with her.

“—Wait,  _ share _ ?” Michael repeated, his heart doing an odd flip-flop, but Alex continued over him: “Anyway, it was Brendon Urie.” 

“No, wait, Ryan Gosling!” 

“Eugh. So you guys have a type,” Michael laughed, managing to sound at least a little derisive, but maybe that was the self-loathing talking. “I’m surprised this hasn’t happened before.” 

“Guerin: the other white meat,” Maria said. 

Alex actually choked. 

“Oh, my  _ God _ ,” Michael groaned, now blushing bright red, but he was smiling now, too, wiping his face. “Okay, okay, help me up. We need to have that talk.” 


	6. Chapter 6

“The government’s already essentially covering up the deaths  _ for  _ us. ‘A splinter group of extremists went out the New Mexico desert, got confused, and shot each other.’ Nothing to see here, folks. Definitely no aliens,” Alex said with a wry, if hard, smile. “They all knew Manes was crazy.” 

Michael was bent over a bowl of cereal, because he really wasn’t ready to fathom anything more complicated than that, certainly not ready for anyone to make anything for him more difficult than that. Once he started eating he felt better, but there was a bottle of acetone and a bucket standing by, just in case. 

“That’s, uh. Convenient,” Michael said, not sure how to feel about this. He was trying not to feel anything about killing thirty people in three seconds, one of them Alex’s dad. Alex seemed to be fairly well-adjusted about it, anyway. 

Maria sat watching him eat, rubbing his arm. 

“You know what’d be convenient?” Michael finally said. “Letting me take the fall for this.” 

Alex and Maria didn’t say anything, looking shocked. 

“Wouldn’t it?” 

“Michael,” Maria began, carefully, like she was trying very hard not to yell at him, “leaving aside the fact that turning you over to the authorities would not actually solve  _ anything— _ ” 

“Do  _ not  _ think that we would  _ ever  _ let anything happen to you like—” Alex began, starting off angry and then sounding almost choked with emotion— “like your mother.”

Michael bristled at that, sat back in the chair, hands in his lap. His defensive posture looked like anyone else’s surrender. Loose, prepared to roll with the punches. 

Maria and Alex took in the same deep breath like they wanted to shout, then caught the other doing it, and let it out, frustrated. He was impossible to yell at like this. They looked at each other like  _ they  _ were having the telepathic conversation, and that wasn’t fair. 

Alex sat down across from him at the small table, gaze still intense. “Listen to me, Guerin. I didn’t go to war and get my leg blown off so I could come back and let anyone take you from me.” 

“Except me,” Maria said, trying to lighten the mood again, and putting a hand on Michael’s shoulder. “Keep eating, Guer, that’s not a suggestion.” 

Michael, still staring at Alex, picked up the spoon and took a bite. 

Alex and Maria exchanged another significant look. 

“Right,” Alex said slowly, trying on a smile. “Except you.” 

Michael found a smile tightening the corners of his mouth, even though he wasn’t ready to talk about this yet. “You guys have  _ got  _ to be kidding about that.” 

“All we’re saying is, we’re not going to make you choose between us,” Maria said, with an exaggerated shrug. “That’s pretty simple, isn’t it? We can start there.” 

“I was going to suggest some ground rules, but…”

“Oh, of course you were, Alex,” Michael huffed, putting his spoon down. 

And now Michael felt crazy, like this, with both of them here trying to make him happy. It made him want to test those boundaries a little, see where they ended just so he could believe it was real. “You know, actually, I’m kinda feeling like a burger and fries. And a milkshake.” 

Alex stood up, vaguely surprised, but pleased. “We can do that for you. I can do that. I’ll go pick it up. All the toppings, right?” 

“Yeah,” Michael said, kind of equally amazed. “Thanks. And maybe pick up some bourbon to go along with it?” 

“First of all,” Maria said, brandishing a bottle—maybe even the same bottle from the Wild Pony that night that felt like a hundred years ago— “dumb of you to think we didn’t already have that covered. And second of all, you’re definitely  _ not  _ getting any, not til we know you’re in the clear.” 

_ Okay, there was the boundary _ , Michael thought, feeling good about that. Secure.

“You’ll get me a burger, too, Al?” Maria asked sweetly. “Please?” 

“Yeah, you wanna call it in so it’ll be ready when I get there?” Alex asked, pausing at the bottom of the ladder, staring up at it. “Order me a chicken burger and onion rings.” 

“Alex—” Michael said, coughing suddenly. Sending the guy with a prosthetic leg up and down a ladder just so he could be demanding wasn’t quite the boundary-pushing he had in mind, even as he felt guilty for thinking that. “You know, I don’t really need—I can just eat whatever’s...here…or we can order a pizza...” 

“Would you actually prefer pizza, or is this about the leg?” Alex really looked like he was contemplating being angry.

“It’s...I just didn’t want to be any...trouble,” Michael said, lamely, when it was very clear that was exactly what he wanted to be. 

Instead of being angry, however, Michael got off with a warning glare as Alex turned to Maria, a very clear  _ You deal with him _ . “Text me whatever I’m picking up.” 

Michael watched Alex scale the ladder using what looked like 90% arm strength, and let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding as soon as the door shut above them. 

Alex hadn’t even gotten  _ mad _ , Michael realized, having expected him to. God, they really were letting him walk all over them. And he was being a shit about it. No wonder they never stayed, no wonder no one ever stayed, why would they? He didn’t know how to behave like a normal person. He probably wasn’t even normal for an alien. 

When Maria got off the phone to place the order (burgers, without asking Michael again), she took the cereal bowl away, dumping it and putting a mug of green tea with mint, according to the little tag, down instead. 

“Drink that or you’re not getting a burger,” she said, “after that stunt. Seeing what you can get out of us. I see what you’re up to. And it's fine, you nearly died, that got us to reassess our priorities, you can probably get away with a lot for a while."

Michael didn't think he was that transparent, but he was talking to a psychic, after all.

"And when that runs out and you come to your senses and make me choose?" Michael asked, defensive. "Or decide you don't—neither of you..."

He shrugged, leaving  _ want me _ unsaid. 

"You might be waiting a long time," Maria said, and that time she sounded angry. Or maybe sad. It was too early in the five-day-coma-morning to tell. 

Michael drank his tea. 

After about ten minutes of solid silence, he asked for a blanket, and she wrapped one around him, all forgiven. 

…

The thing about getting food from the Crashdown was that it meant everyone knew Michael was awake, and Alex let himself be bullied into taking Max and Isobel with him. 

Michael stood up, surprised as he saw them starting to descend the ladder, Isobel stumbling every other step in her hurry, and Max going slow, too.  _ Max _ , whom he hadn’t even seen  _ alive  _ yet...

“Max. Iz!” 

Max saved them all the trouble of figuring out who would cry first as the twins all but slammed into Michael, holding him,  _ alive _ , and then all of them were crying and at some point the cryfest ended up on the floor, because none of them were too steady on their feet. 

“Okay, okay, get up, I have all the blackmail evidence I need,” Maria said, putting away her phone.

“Hey, guys? I hate to break up the reunion, but until we install a dumbwaiter, I could use a hand to get all the food down,” Alex called from top of the ladder. 

Maria yelped and went to help him, and eventually Isobel followed her. Max and Michael stayed on the floor, just staring at each other, gripping each other’s shirts. 

“You—” 

“I couldn’t let you—”

“I never—I couldn’t protect you, Michael...I’m sorry, I’m so sorry…” Max was always so damn earnest, making Michael open up in kind, and he hated that most of all. “Sorry for everything.”

“Don’t. Jesus, Max, I killed—”

Max hauled him into another hug, crushing the air out of him, crying harder. “You were protecting us, Michael. Thank you. Oh, God, thank you, for protecting them. You always protect us.” 

“Max,” Michael said, with great feeling, and squeezed Max’s shoulder. “Don’t be so dramatic.” 

That made Max laugh, wetly, and it made Michael grin.

“Okay, big guy,” Maria said, hauling Max to his feet. “You’re getting tears all over our boyfriend. We just washed him.” 

Max looked up at her, hopeful, but let Maria sit him down in a chair. “Y-you guys talked, then? You worked it out?” 

“Can we just...pretend we’re not a small town where everyone's way too involved with everyone else’s business?” Alex pleaded. “Just for one meal.”

“Give us a break, this is  _ family  _ being way too involved in family’s business,” Isobel said, but caught the vaguely strained look in Alex’s eyes, and didn’t press any further. 


	7. Chapter 7

“Okay, so what  _ did  _ you guys cover without me?” Michael wondered, after the Ortecho sisters had come by to collect Max and Isobel. He was full enough, sober enough, and just annoyed enough by the visit from the twins to be ready to talk—ready to  _ argue _ . 

“Michael,” Alex scolded, not liking his tone, probably, but Maria held up a hand.

“It’s okay, Alex. I’m sure he has some questions.” 

“Yeah. Like when do I wake up from this…” Michael snapped. He was going to say ‘nightmare’ to be as rough and uncouth as everyone expected from him, though ‘dream’ was more what he meant. As it was he just didn’t finish. 

“You’re awake, Guer,” Maria said softly, stepping up to him and reaching out like she wanted to touch his hair, but stopping herself. Instead she touched his hand, heartened when he didn’t move away. “And we both love you.” 

“Always have,” Alex agreed, sitting in a chair on Michael’s other side. 

Michael looked back and forth between them, once, and then slid his chair away from the table and got up, turning away. He couldn’t look at them like this. 

“Yeah, well. You had a funny way of showing it.” 

“ _ Michael _ ,” Maria said, very sternly this time, and he froze. “Look. We do both owe you an apology. And I’m not giving mine to your back.” 

Michael was surprised enough by that to turn around. 

“I jerked you around in high school and didn’t give you a second glance for ten years, and after we had sex I told you I wanted to forget it immediately,” Maria said, like this was rehearsed. “And I’m sorry. That was wrong, and not how my Mama raised me. I want you to know that I want to try again, if you do.” 

Michael had to lean against the counter, visibly staggered, though he was still trying to play this off impassively. 

“And I—” Alex began, with much more trouble, but with equal determination, “I couldn’t protect you in high school, and, uh, now that I can, I’m not sure you need it,” he laughed uneasily, unclenching his fists. “And I’ve been jerking you around, too. But I’m going to do better. I want to try.” 

Michael let out a shuddering breath, managing a deflecting-with-humor smile. “You wait til I’m vulnerable to spring this on me.” 

Alex turned to Maria. “I told you we should have waited.” 

“You don’t have to answer, Michael,” Maria said, looking suspiciously between the both of them. “But the... _ usual _ way apologies work is that you try to forgive and try to move on. You let the person know how to make it right. I’m sorta guessing you two didn’t have any healthy examples of apologies, like, ever. So. Just so you know, that’s what we’re aiming for.” 

It came off a little condescending, but maybe they needed that. 

Michael at least had the decency to laugh sheepishly. “O-okay. I’ll try.” 

Alex, as usual, took the news about being from a broken home harder, trying to skip past the moment. “We should go to bed. I—I could leave, if you don’t want me here, Michael, I’ll sleep in the trailer, or you can send me—” 

“No,” Michael said, confident in this one thing, though he couldn’t look at either of them, staring at the wall. 

Maybe he was still afraid to ask for what he wanted, or maybe he felt like he was demanding too much again, testing boundaries again: 

“I want you to stay. Both of you.” 

And either it was a small thing they could grant him, so they did it easily, which Michael understood, or else it was a thing they  _ wanted  _ to grant him, which was totally new and incomprehensible. 

“Okay,” Maria said, smiling encouragingly.

“We’ll stay,” Alex agreed.

…

Michael ran warm, which meant he wanted to  _ be  _ warm, so the middle was a practical place for him. 

“You can touch me,” Michael said, when Alex rolled away.

“I’m taking care of my leg.” 

Michael turned around, despite thinking better of it, to watch. He couldn’t see much, just Alex’s muscular back under a thin T-shirt, and then suddenly the leg coming away—both it and crutches set within easy reach of the bed. It was a trundle bed of some kind, not very comfortable, and not very big, but moved in here for the purpose of his recovery, apparently.

There was a sweaty rubbery-looking part of the prosthetic where it connected to Alex’s leg, and he was wiping it out with baby wipes. Michael had never seen him take care of his leg before. It had always been on or torn off in the heat of the moment and put back in embarrassment in the morning. 

Maria’s hand cupped his chin, turning him toward her, looking like she wanted to kiss his lips, but she just kissed him right between the eyes, instead. 

“You the police or something?” Michael asked her, wryly. What if he wanted to watch?

“Just helping you be good.” 

Michael’s smile relaxed at that, and he stretched, gazing up at Maria playfully. “I’m always good.” 

“Oh, you wish,” Alex laughed, hitting him with a pillow as he turned around and got under the covers, and then shoving them half off of himself, poking his foot out. “You...said you wanted me close?” 

“He’s like a million degrees,” Maria said, laughing as she settled on Michael’s other side. Then she sat up. “And his toenails are like daggers.”

“ _ How I Met Your Mother _ ,” Michael said, recognizing the quote, and scowling. “And they are not!” 

But she was already going through a sparkly make-up bag and handing him a toenail clipper. Next came a wastebasket, and Michael sat up with a sigh. 

“Okay, I’ve been in a coma for a week, remember. It’s not my fault they got out of hand.” But Michael dutifully trimmed his toenails before scrambling back under the covers. 

“Good boy,” Maria hummed. 

That made Michael smile. Alex was a warm, solid weight to bump up against in the small bed, and he hummed as Maria followed him and clicked off the lamps, the low light of various other electronics giving the room an ambient glow. 

“I’m 100.3,” Michael said in the darkness. “That’s my normal body temp. If you wanted to know.” 

“You know, mine’s usually kinda low,” Alex said. “Like in the 97 range.”

“I was reading this article on Facebook that, like, human body temperatures have dropped over the last two hundred years, actually,” Maria said. “They did this big study with historical data. The average human body temperature  _ isn’t  _ 98.6, anymore.” 

“Huh,” Alex and Michael said.

“Article say anything about alien body temperatures?” Michael asked. 

She pinched him and giggled when he squirmed. 

“It’s a good thing you’re so warm, because you’re a horrible blanket hog,” Aex said, rolling onto his side to spoon behind Michael. There was no way there was enough room for them all to sleep on their backs.

“Hey, blankets just don’t go as far with three people,” Michael protested, like he knew from experience or something, but he wasn’t complaining for the extra warmth. 

Maria, too, cuddled close. “That’s probably true. I think you just get cold easily.”

“You have no idea what it’s like being an alien sleeping alone in the middle of winter,” Michael said, trying to go for funny, though it came out kind of sad. “All three weeks of it. I have a lot of blankets.” 

“Well now you have us.” 

Maria squirmed closer, tucking Michael’s head against her neck. His nose was cold. They had a moment of negotiating legs, laughing, until Michael tucked his cold toes against Alex’s leg, which Alex kind of liked, it turned out. 

“Okay, everyone settled?” Alex demanded, sounding vaguely annoyed. Maria shifted again, getting Michael’s arm under her and around her back. 

“Settled,” she agreed. 

And with his free hand, Michael reached behind him, resting his hand on Alex’s thigh, and then curling it around his back, palm flat. 

The memory struck him suddenly as he was drifting off to sleep, and his eyes snapped open. He must have jerked, because Maria and Alex started up, too. 

“I left handprints on you guys, didn’t I?” 

Even in the darkness Michael could see Maria and Alex share a look. 

“Yeah, you did. When you kissed us, just before you... They only just faded this morning,” Maria said, petting his hair and not letting him sit up. 

“Shit, I—I’m sorry—”

“Michael,” Alex said, grabbing Michael’s wrist when he tried to withdraw his hand. “Max is right, you saved all of us. What are you apologizing for?” 

Both Michael’s hands were fists, like he didn’t trust his open palms pressed to their bodies. 

“N-not asking permission, I guess,” Michael offered, lamely, but he really meant something more like  _ for submitting you to the mortifying ordeal of knowing me right before I was planning on killing myself _ . 

“It helped,” Maria said, kissing his forehead. “It’s so hard to know what you  _ want _ , Guerin. It...made it easier for us to talk while you were out.”

“It connected us, too, you know,” Alex added, kissing the back of Michael’s neck. “You got me back together with my best friend.”

“Aw, Alex,” Maria said, reaching across Michael to squeeze Alex’s arm, and that, too, was oddly comforting to Michael. 

Michael was quiet, but eventually he relaxed his hands, splaying them over Alex’s hip and Maria’s back again. He was really too tired for this, lulled by the food and warmth and proximity to love like he’d never known. “S-so we can just...do this?” 

“I want ground rules,” Alex said, voice raised slightly, hot breath on Michael’s neck sending a shiver down his spine. 

Maria laughed and shifted her smooth leg over Michael’s. “You’re being a stereotype. I don’t know what of, but a stereotype. A dude, a gay dude, a military dude, something.” 

“Oh, go to sleep, you hippie,” Alex replied. 

Michael fell asleep to the soothing sounds of them continuing to bicker. 


	8. Chapter 8

“Okay, what do these ground rules look like?” Michael asked the next morning over a bowl of cereal, which he was eating enthusiastically this time. He was feeling stronger, but still allowed Maria and Alex to dote on him because this was still kind of a novel experience. 

“What  _ would  _ they look like,” Alex corrected, pouring himself some more coffee carefully, still looking sleep-rumpled. “I have some suggestions, but they should be mutually agreed upon. Maria—can you—sorry—” 

“Sure,” Maria said, taking Alex’s coffee to the table for him, since he hadn’t yet put on his prosthetic and was using his crutches. 

“Okay, well I don’t have any threesome experience, unless watching  _ Leverage  _ counts.” 

Maria snorted, nearly spraying coffee everywhere as she sat down next to Alex, across from Michael. “Oh my God, they are fucking, aren’t they? I’ve seen like two episodes and I ship it.” 

Alex rubbed the bridge of his nose. “Can we focus, please? A threesome, as in, sex with more than one person at the same time, is something I’m  _ not  _ particularly interested in. I’m interested in negotiating the bounds of our, ah, polyamorous relationship.” 

Maria cupped her mouth to whisper to Michael: “He doesn’t want to call it ‘sharing a boyfriend,’” which made them both giggle, Michael with a little more bewilderment. 

“What, so like a timeshare?” Michael asked, still trying not to laugh. “Or like I’m a kid with parents who’re divorced? Weekends and every-other Wednesdays?” 

The whole thing was so far-fetched he couldn’t keep a straight face: any person wanting him enough, much less two people, to  _ negotiate  _ for him, was just hilarious. 

“You are an adult, Michael,” Alex said, and suddenly the conversation was very serious. “We’re saying we won’t make you choose between us exclusively. Platonically, romantically, even, you’ve got both of us. But sexually, you are going to have to choose, even if it's just night to night.” 

Michael took a moment to parse that, as the smile faded from his face.  _ There  _ was reality, crashing back, when he thought, briefly, giddily, that he could have it all. This was serious, and this was complicated, it turned out. 

“Or you can choose between us if you decide you just want—” Maria began, but Michael interrupted her. 

“No. No, I don’t want—” Michael put his head in his hands, staring down at his Cheerios like they might have the answer. Finally, he managed, stumbling, “I w-want  _ both  _ of—you.” 

Then he looked up at them helplessly. “I can’t  _ choose _ .” 

Alex and Maria looked surprisingly okay with this, which baffled Michael.

“I told you, Al,” Maria said quietly. 

“That’s okay, Michael,” Alex said, grabbing his wrist to squeeze it comfortingly. “Can we offer some alternate suggestions?” 

Michael nodded dumbly. 

“Eat your cereal,” Maria reminded.

Michael picked up his spoon again. 

“So we start with, everyone updating their STI screenings before we do anything. Everyone.” 

Michael opened his mouth, but Maria cut him off: “You can go see Kyle.” 

This was, somehow, not a suggestion. Michael nodded. As mortifying as that would be, at least Valenti wasn’t going to report anything weird about his alien anatomy. 

“And this relationship stays exclusive,” was Alex’s next suggestion. “I don’t sleep with anyone but you, Maria doesn’t sleep with anyone but you, and you do not even  _ look  _ at anyone besides the two of us.” 

Michael’s breath caught in a laugh at how  _ authoritative  _ that was, and then he realized Alex was serious, and Maria’s face was, too. And then his shoulders straightened up on their own and he found himself nodding and feeling really weirdly okay about it, maybe even  _ good  _ about it. “Yeah. Uh. Okay.” 

“Yeah, you did tell me, holy shit,” Alex said to Maria, suddenly smiling. 

“Okay, _ tell him what _ ?” Michael demanded. 

“I just knew you didn’t have a dominant enough personality to do the choosing yourself,” Maria said. “So would it be alright if  _ we  _ worked it out between us? Like who you went home with and when?” 

Michael did some calculations in his head. That would be the best way to keep both of them happiest, probably, and the least likely way he could hurt either of their feelings,  _ and  _ how he could be sure he was going home with whoever wanted him most at the moment so he wasn’t intruding if someone wasn’t in the mood for him. It was also maybe the way to keep this going the longest, since he still didn’t trust it to be permanent. 

“With your input, of course. You can always say no or...” Alex began, when he didn’t answer right away. 

“Yeah,” Michael agreed immediately. “Yeah, I—I wouldn’t want to just—like I was choosing one of you over the other, that—that wouldn’t feel right. So I’d like it if you two—yeah. Decided.” 

“Great,” Maria said. “We’ll keep it as equal as we can, but I work late most nights, and—anyway, we’ll work it out.” 

“Okay,” Michael said, finding himself relaxing, beginning to hope again that this might all work out, even if just for now. 

“And we do group dates at least once a week. Maybe more, at the beginning,” Maria suggested. “I think it’s important that we do the relationship stuff together a lot, too.” 

Michael nodded. That sounded best of all, actually. “I can make you guys watch  _ Leverage _ .”

Alex laughed. “I think she meant dates  _ out _ , but yeah. Dates  _ in  _ is a good idea, too.”

“I meant just doing stuff together,” Maria corrected. “If it’s not for sex, everyone’s automatically invited.” 

Michael nodded. It sounded a bit like scheduling sex, which wasn’t romantic to  _ him _ , but as long as he wasn’t a decision-maker in the scheduling, that was probably fine. He suspected, actually, that the idea of scheduling sex actually appealed to Maria and Alex. 

(Maybe  _ he  _ had a type.) 

He sighed, sitting back from his empty bowl. “You know, I’m really glad you’re gay, Alex.” 

Alex grinned. “Why’s that?” 

“Because if you were anywhere else on the Kinsey scale, you two would have been so married, already, and I’d’ve been out of luck.” 

Maria laughed. “I dunno, I could see you as the sexy pool boy in our hetero-white-picket-fence alternate reality.” 

“I like you better as a sister-wife,” Alex teased. 

“Ugh! Gross!” Maria laughed, getting up to take the dishes reflexively. “Don’t bring weird religions into something so beautiful.”

Michael didn’t mention one of the other things that he learned about Rath, his clone, the one on Antar, having several wives and concubines, one of whom was  _ supposed  _ to be Isobel. That, too, was just gross. 

Anyway, he was kind of liking the vibe he was getting from this whole discussion of  _ him  _ being like the concubine Maria and Alex shared. Except that wasn’t how concubines worked, was it? 

Michael stood up. “I have a rule to suggest.”

Maria and Alex stopped, surprised, but indulgent. 

“Yeah?”

“When she’s off the clock, Maria isn’t allowed to do any dishes.” 

“You guys...” Maria said fondly, but didn’t argue. 

“Agreed,” Alex said very quickly, getting himself to his feet. “If you bring them to the sink, for me, Guerin, I’ll wash them.” 

“I got ‘em this time,” Michael said, and before he could lose his nerve, he said, “Can we go on a date tonight? I kinda want to get out.” 

When he turned around, Alex and Maria were smiling, leaning together at the table. 

“Sure.” 

“Of course.” 


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> With apologies to Texas. 
> 
> JK I'm not sorry. 
> 
> #NewMexicoTrue

The date ended up being a wildly romantic late lunch trip to KFC, since Maria had to get back to the Pony that evening to work the closing shift. 

“You didn’t really plan this right. You should have taken less time off when I was  _ unconscious  _ so you’d have more time off now,” Michael suggested with his mouth full of neon yellow macaroni and cheese.

“Don’t be gross,” Maria scolded. 

They were surrounded by tourists, which was nice, in a way. It felt more anonymous than being in a local haunt where their neighbors and friends might overhear them. There were a lot of Texans, though, which was always just psychically exhausting. 

“So, maybe you could let me pick up some shifts with you?” Michael suggested. “You won’t have to pay me. Or you can pay me in drink.” 

Maria laughed. “I might  _ lose  _ money on you that way. But yeah, that’d be a nice way for us to hang out.” 

“I can even bring my work over, sometimes, too,” Alex suggested. “Then we can all hang out, kind of. Unless you want it to be just you two.” 

“I thought the rule was that romantic and platonic time we spend together,” Maria said, nudging Alex’s arm. 

Alex actually shook himself, primly. “Sorry, yeah. I’m still getting used to this.”

“Well, we should all stay together in the bunker until Michael stops walking like a baby horse—and then maybe try a few days alone at our own places, to have some space to think about this,” Maria suggested. 

Michael tried not to feel too disappointed by that, but figured it was probably for the best. What did he know about steady relationships of any kind? Maybe this was normal? 

“That sounds good to me,” Alex said. 

“Sure,” Michael said, not sure at all. 

“And you’re going to see Kyle first,” Alex said, meanly. “And we should all go to Walmart together.” 

“Oh, right, good plan,” Maria said. 

“Wal...mart?” 

“You’re going to need two new toothbrushes, pillows, I need a heated blanket, apparently,” Alex suggested. 

“I don’t need a  _ heated blanket _ ,” Michael protested, rolling his eyes, but that was big talk for someone sitting in full sun at a picnic table outside. 

Maria ignored him, already making a list on her phone. “Extra underwear, clothes, whatever product you use for your hair…” 

“Pro...duct?” 

“Ugh, you really never have had a steady partner before, and it shows,” Maria said.

“ _ I _ use product for my hair and it’s not even curly,” Alex said. “You’re the most hetero bi guy I’ve ever known, you know that? It’s sad.” 

Michael actually laughed at this, because it kind of gave him a warm fuzzy feeling to have people interested in running his life who actually wanted good things for him. He hadn’t been poor and homeless enough for even shampoo to even be an issue for years, so, maybe it was time. He listened to Maria and Alex continue to make a list—towels, socks, toothpaste, pillowcases, new sheets, beer, acetone—of how to keep Michael happy and comfortable in each of their homes. 

“Lube and condoms,” Alex suggested.

“Waiting on that until we get the all-clear from the doctors,” Maria said, shaking her head. “But we will want to go shopping together, to make sure we’re all using water-based lube or something that’s safe for everything we’re all using.” 

“What, are we going on a date to a sex shop now?” Alex wondered. 

Michael giggled a little inappropriately as an uptight mother covered her kid's ears at the table next to them. He suddenly had a sneaking suspicion that Maria had been holding back on him the two times they’d had sex before. And he  _ knew  _ Alex had been, as uptight as he always was. 

Now Michael really didn’t want to wait the week or so it would take to get results back. 


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rating change!

“Now, you do all know that these results don’t mean jack,” Kyle attempted, jerking the printed papers out of Michael’s reach like they were in high school again and this was a jock vs. freak game of keepaway. “We barely know your baselines, what’s normal for you, whether you’re  _ supposed  _ to have those crabs…”

“Oh, fuck you, Valenti,” Michael said cheerfully, finally snatching the results. Of course, written in medical jargon, he couldn’t make much sense of them. He’d never had an STI screening, of course, and it mostly meant answering a lot of super awkward questions for super awkward Kyle, who was someone he definitely did not want to disclose information about his sex life to. 

“I mean, you check out fine, except for the anomalies you know about. So, nothing’s wrong with you that we can recognize, anyway. And you're not a carrier. Though as what passes for your doctor I should remind you to use condoms and try not to get anyone, I dunno, tentacle-pregnant.” 

Michael snorted. “Never pegged you for an anime watcher before, Valenti.” 

“And I never thought I’d have to hear you say the word ‘pegged’ in this context, so we’re even,” Kyle said, but he looked as smug as Michael felt. “You’re fine, get out of here. I’m going to go bleach my brain before I take your sister out for dinner tonight.” 

Michael stopped at the door, turning around with wide eyes. “You and Isobel? I’m not sure if I should be impressed or start praying for you now.” 

But it had been a while since Noah, and if Isobel had a physical type then Kyle fit it as well as Noah had, and anyway they were both pretty and shallow enough. They probably deserved each other. 

(Though he had hoped that thing with Rosa would have gone...somewhere. Would have been nice not to be the only gay alien in town, though he did have to admit maybe dating someone ten years younger than you who still thought Papa Roach was the height of cool left something to be desired.) 

“Thanks, Guerin,” Kyle said sarcastically. “Don’t lose those papers, they’re the only copy that exist. I deleted your file.” 

That, too, gave Michael pause, of a different kind. “Hey, you know. Thanks, man. I—I don’t think I even ever thanked you for—saving my life, in the cave…”

“Thank me by telling me Isobel’s favorite flowers or something.” 

“Fuck if I know,” Michael lied. “She’s not shy about what she wants, man. Just don’t be a serial killer and don’t let her lay her alien eggs in you.” 

Michael shot him finger guns, tucking the papers under his arm. 

“Oh my God, get out of my hospital,” Kyle said, but he was laughing. 

…

All Michael knew was to head to the Wild Pony after work. He knew Maria worked late tonight, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t close up the bar and walk upstairs with her at three. The past four nights he’d spent in his bunker, alone, feeling the emptiness of it and wondering how he’d survived it for so long. But tonight, papers in hand, he stood a very good chance of being invited to one of his—partners’? lovers’? He hadn’t decided on a gender-neutral collective term for them, yet—so, to either his boyfriend’s or girlfriend’s bed. 

“Hey, DeLuca around?” he asked Esme, the girl who helped Maria out when she was off. 

“Yeah, she’s closing tonight.” 

“I know, I’m used to disappointment,” he told her with a grin. 

“She’s doing stock before I clock out officially,” Esme reported, raking her eyes over him in a way that made him feel invincible. He let her look: he  _ was  _ wearing his best jeans and his largest belt buckle, and Alex had been right, product really  _ did  _ help his hair do amazing things. “She’s in the back. She said it would be okay for you to go help her.”

Michael tapped his forehead like he was tipping his hat, though he wasn’t wearing one. “I’ll go check it out. See if she needs me to reach anything not that high up.” 

Esme, who was several inches taller than Maria, snorted, and waved him back. 

Michael didn’t make it very far into the storehouse before he found himself shoved roughly up against a wall. The instinct to use his powers was so thoroughly beaten out of him that they didn’t so much as flicker, though he did flinch, until he realized it was Maria, smiling up at him brilliantly, almost sharply. 

“Now what’s a pretty boy like you doing in a place like this?” 

“Oof. DeLuca, what the hell?” he tried, but then she had a hand in his hair, tugging, and she was kissing him until he couldn't breathe, and suddenly very little else mattered. 

“Just came to tell you,” he gasped when they broke, and handed her the folder. “I’m all good.” 

“ _ Good _ . You have a condom?” Maria asked, palming his pockets way too liberally to actually be looking for anything. 

“Uh…” Michael said, and it turned into a nervous laugh. “I didn’t know there was gonna be a test, DeLuca! But I—ah, did-did you ask—I mean, is—what about Alex?” 

Michael knew as soon as he said it that he had probably just screwed things up, said the wrong thing, but she only gave him a soft look, like she knew he was riding the struggle bus and so was willing to let it slide. 

“Babe, that’s not something you need to worry about, okay? Only thing you need to worry about is you. I’ve got twenty-two minutes before Esme’s shift ends and thirty-seven until Alex gets here—but if you’re not interested…” 

“Oh, no, no,” Michael said dumbly, “I’m interested. Very interested.” 

“Good,” Maria said, dragging him off to the dusty old turquoise couch in the back and pushing him down onto it before climbing into his lap. 

Michael smiled, almost laughed again, giddy with this, his hands going around her waist as he leaned up to kiss her. 

“What if Esme comes back here?” he gasped, but she ignored him.

“Don’t miss up my hair,” was all she said before she was kissing him back, pulling up her long skirt and reaching down into her panties. 

“I—I’ve got a condom in my wallet,” Michael managed, finally, kissing her neck, softly, reverently, careful not to leave a mark. He went to unhook her bra but she pushed his hands away before fishing for his wallet. “Do...you want me to keep some on me?”

Michael didn’t like rules, but he liked knowing what people wanted from him. Planning for future, guaranteed, regular sex with the same two people sounded so beautiful Michael couldn’t think what else he might use his pockets for. If she asked him to, his pockets would bulge with condoms every day. Wishful thinking, even in his wishful thoughts.

Maria only giggled, going through his wallet like she owned it and finding the condom tucked in there. It was a little old, the wrapper worn. “Might be a good idea.” 

She didn’t remove his belt, just unbuckled it and laid the huge buckle off to the side, completely in charge of her movements and his. “Now, if I’m going to come, you’re going to have to do everything I say, got it?” 

Michael’s grin grew wry, teasing—he’d never leave her wanting, but he had to know: “What happens if you don’t?” 

“Then you are going to stay until I get my break at ten, and you know what time Alex turns into a pumpkin.” 

“Got it,” Michael agreed (though he didn’t really know when Alex liked to go to sleep, actually, considering they had only ever accidentally had sex, and living with him for a few days in the bunker when everyone slept throughout the day probably didnt’ give him an accurate read). Now he was almost lightheaded thinking about that, too, and had to force himself to focus on the moment. It was high pressure under a time constraint, but the kind of pressure Michael thrived under. He reached up under her skirt, rubbing her with the flat of his palm over her soft cotton panties. “I’d do better if you let me use my mouth.” 

“Ooh, baby,” Maria purred, bucking into his hand. “Later, definitely. But I want to see you come for me, too.” 

She directed his hands, pushing her panties aside and then finally pulling them off. She barely touched him, just enough to get him hard and roll a condom on him, but she didn’t really need to, God, because her mouth— 

“You’re just so pretty, Guerin, in your slutty little jeans. Like I wouldn’t notice you’re wearing jeans so worn I can see your cock in them. Gonna send you off to Alex all sex-sloppy and filthy, what about that, huh, baby? He’ll have to hose you down before he can have any fun with you.  _ That’s  _ it, baby, yeah, there, get your fingers  _ in  _ me, fuck.” 

“ _ Maria _ ,” Michael panted, kissing her neck, but then she grabbed his hair and yanked him to the side so she could suck a bruise into the side of his neck as she came, grinding out her own pleasure on his thumb and fingers. 

“Good,  _ good _ ,” she hummed, a little breathless, and then finally, finally straddled him, and it was almost too much sensation all at once as she slid down his cock, since she’d now moved on to biting his ear and rolling her hips slowly. “You’re so good for me, Guerin. You gonna be good for Alex, too?” 

“Yeah. Fuck, yes,” Michael responded, not sure what he was responding to, really, or why this dirty little quickie in the storeroom at her work felt warmer and sweeter than anything they had shared before. The thrill of possibly getting caught felt almost like being a kid again, like his first time with Alex—except he wasn’t supposed to compare this to that, was he?

“Shut off the brain, Michael,” Maria warned, and she flicked his nipple,  _ hard _ , which was the first he knew that she’d gotten his shirt open. 

“Sorry,” Michael mumbled, grunting and pressing his lips to the column of her throat as he jerked his hips—almost experimentally, wondering if he was allowed to chase his pleasure, yet. 

“You be good for Alex, okay?” Maria asked, moving so slightly, not enough, and Michael got the impression that he was going to have to do more of the work here, whenever she let him, “and you talk to him if he wants to talk. Got it?” 

Maria grabbed the sides of his neck, pulling him up to look at her. 

Michael swallowed and nodded. “Yes, ma’am.” 

“Good. Come for me, baby,” she whispered then, bracing herself and gripping his hair and the back of the couch as he jacked his hips into her and came hard enough to see stars. 

She let him breathe against her until his heart and breathing slowed, and he kissed her again, wetly, her hands back on his neck. Her touches weren’t rough so much as they were firm, and he liked that. Idly, she scratched her nails over the back of his hand, where it pressed into her thigh. “You didn’t leave a mark that time.” 

“Oh,” Michael said, looking down, jerking his hand back. “It’s not usually something that just—happens. Did you want me to?” 

Maria nodded. “Sometime. I think we need to, to check in. But right now I’m very happy with you.” 

She kissed him and crawled off his lap while he processed that. She grabbed her panties and headed towards the bathroom. “Alright. You clean yourself up, and take this case out to the front for me when you’re ready.” She kicked a crate on her way. 

Michael was smiling, his head lolling back on the couch, dick still out. “Yes, ma’am,” he drawled. 

“And I want you to text me in the morning, or if anything goes wrong. If Alex gets difficult or whatever…”

Michael shrugged. “I told you I’d be good for him, didn’t I?” 

Maria beamed like the sun, and leaned down to kiss him again. “Yeah, you did, baby. Love you.” 

She didn’t give him time to say it back before she was gone, but his lips twitched in the right direction. 


	11. Chapter 11

Michael felt even dirtier after the whore’s bath he gave himself in the bathroom, but in a good-dirty way. Feeling invincible, he carried the case to the bar for Maria like she asked, and then carried in a few more under her direction. These tasks seemed mostly like a ploy to keep him busy until after Esme had gone, so she wouldn’t flirt with him, but Maria set out a lager for him to drink afterward, so he wasn’t even mad. 

The jealousy was kind of a turn-on, actually, since Maria didn’t mind sharing him with the person that mattered. 

He didn’t even realize he was nervous until he found he had gulped down almost the whole beer with still ten minutes to go before Alex was supposed to be there, and then he suddenly felt like he was going on a first date and was nervous as hell. He suddenly appreciated Maria’s tactic of just grabbing him out of nowhere. That seemed to work best. 

“That was supposed to  _ relax  _ you,” she scolded, as if following his thoughts. “Can I put you to work?” 

“Yeah. Please,” Michael found himself saying.

That made her give him an appraising look, but it was one he liked. 

“Okay. I’ve got a fridge in the back that stopped working for no reason. See if you can figure it out. I’ll call you when he gets here.” 

Relieved, Michael kissed her as he passed, loading his empty pint glass into the dishwasher where it belonged.

The engineering problem did keep him busy, and made time actually pass by, or else Alex was early, because Michael had barely gotten the back panel off when Alex stood in the doorway, grinning. 

“Jesus, she really did put you to work.” 

Michael scrambled to his feet. “Oh, it was just—she just wanted me to see if I could tell what was wrong with it. Hadn’t got started though, really. I'm ready to go whenever." 

Alex smiled at him a long minute, thoughtfully, while Michael felt like a bug under a microscope. 

“Why don’t you clean up and come join me?” he finally said. “Let’s have a drink and a bite first.”

“Yeah,” Michael said, and waited until Alex was gone again before falling over himself to put the fridge back together and put the tools away and wash his hands. 

When he returned to the bar, Maria and Alex were already laughing about something, and they kept laughing when they saw him, which was maybe a good sign. Alex hooked his left leg around a stool to push it out for him, and Michael smiled shyly as he slid into it. “Hey.” 

“Hey,” Alex said, apparently over his deep thoughts from before. He reached up and curled his hand around the back of Michael’s neck, thumbing a mark just under his ear. He turned around, leaving his hand there. “ _ Really _ , Maria?” 

Maria blew him a kiss from the other end of the bar. “Think about it like a love note from your best friend!” 

The bar was basically empty, but Alex rolled his eyes, anyway. Michael laughed, a little breathlessly. This was really happening. It was so normal they were  _ joking  _ about it. He almost felt faint. 

"She's going to be incorrigible," Alex said quietly, moving into Michael's space. "And she keeps texting me. About you."

Michael huffed, blushing. This news felt less like they were talking about him behind his back and more like he was a celebrity. All the attention was still kind of overwhelming, because it just broke down every wall he had ever tried to put up around himself all his life, he was so weak for it. “You guys text about me?” 

“It’s kind of annoying. She thinks I don’t know how to take care of you,” Alex ventured, and Michael vaguely recognized it as a tactic to get information without directly asking for it. 

“I’m easy,” Michael found himself blurting out, falling for it, though the real answer was that he didn’t know how to talk about himself, so maybe the joke was on Alex. “You two are hard.”

Alex just stared at him again at that, though, and “Hm,” was all he said. 

…

“Follow me to the cabin,” Alex said when he stood, precisely one hour later, pulling on his jacket. It wasn’t that cold outside, but he looked good in the jacket. The bar was getting crowded enough to keep Maria busy, so there wasn’t much reason for them to stay.

“You mean  _ race _ you to the cabin?” Michael asked, grin spreading. 

“No, I mean follow me to the cabin in the range of the speed limit. If you get pulled over, I’m not having sex with you for like a month,” Alex said firmly, and Michael acquiesced with a grin. Then Alex frowned at him. “Didn’t you bring a jacket?” 

Michael looked around himself like he might find one, though no, of course not, and when he looked back, Alex was shrugging out of  _ his  _ jacket, muttering about _ dumb ass alien going to catch your death of cold _ and thrust the jacket at him. “Put it on.” 

Michael was left holding Alex’s jacket as Alex headed around the bar to hug Maria and accept a kiss on the cheek and something whispered in his ear.  _ You’re gross _ , was all Michael heard Alex say in response, laughing, before he was ducking out the door. 

“You gonna put that on?” Maria asked, coming by to pick up their stacked pint glasses. boy gave you his jacket, that's some  _ Star Wars _ romance shit. Don’t chicken out on us.” 

“No, no way, I never chicken out,” Michael said, suddenly spurred to action. He tugged the jacket on, warm leather that smelled like cow and dye and Alex’s deodorant. It was a bit big in the shoulders, but slightly too short in the arms, so it worked out to a pretty good fit. “I just—I still can’t believe this is happening, DeLuca...I need you to pinch me.” 

“Come here,” Maria said, jerking her head, her hands full. “Give me a kiss.” 

Kissing Maria did make him feel better, it always did. His shoulders relaxed and maybe, he thought, this was all going to work out.

Maria smiled at him, and it had the same effect as when she told him he was a good boy. “Now go get him, tiger.” 


	12. Chapter 12

Pulling up to Alex’s cabin, Michael was grateful for the jacket: he forgot how much cooler it was outside of town. Also, it smelled like Alex, and that mostly helped him to calm down, though it also was giving him an awkward boner. 

As he pulled up, his headlights reflected against Alex, who waved him to drive around to the back, and he directed him to back up facing the side of the cabin. Before Michael could even get out or ask what was going on, Alex turned on some Christmas lights and came out the back door with his hands full. 

“What…” Michael began, and Alex put a bundle of mattress pads in his hands. 

“Make up a bed in the back. I’ll get the projector set up.” 

“Pro...jector?” 

Alex stopped, and turned to face him. “I owe you an apology for the drive-in. I want to make it up to you.”

“Oh,” Michael said. “But you don’t…” 

“When you’re done with the bed, go grab a DVD from the den,” Alex said, already setting up a movie projector onto the roof of his truck. “Anything you want to watch.” 

Michael had no choice but to do as he was told. The bed was quick to set up, and then he wandered in to go through Alex’s extensive DVD collection. He grabbed a few from the top, leafing through them, and returned with his selection. 

“ _ The Force Awakens _ and... _ The Brave Little Toaster _ ?” Alex asked when he returned, eyebrows quirking but lips smiling. “You want to watch both?” 

Michael shrugged, thumb tucked into his belt loop as he held the DVDs defensively in front of him. “I dunno. I think I remembered really loving  _ The Brave Little Toaster _ when I was a kid, but we didn’t have a lot of movies in the group home. ...Now that I think about it, not sure I necessarily want to have sex to it, though?” 

Alex laughed. “Yeah, but, you know if you put X-Wings in front of me, sex is going to be the furthest thing from my mind.”

“I thought they got you hot and bothered?” 

Alex gave him a sly look, or like he thought Michael was being sly. “Am I that transparent?” 

“Uh, well, you’re that  _ nerdy… _ ” 

Alex laughed, but plucked the DVD out of Michael’s hands, locking gazes with him. “Try again. Pick a movie  _ you  _ want to watch. Not what you think I want to watch. I’ll be clear when I want something from you.” 

Michael licked his lips, unable to look away. “You  _ have  _ been talking to Maria.” 

“Is she wrong that that’s what you want? Clearly stated desires, and boundaries?” 

“I hate boundaries.” Michael laughed a little breathlessly and broke eye contact, cheeks flushing. “Alex, I—look, I’m so far from having  _ preferences _ , with this—with you two, I just—all I  _ want  _ is to not screw this up.” 

Alex frowned, seemed startled by the admission, shifting. “Sorry, we should—can we sit down?” 

“Yeah, oh my God, I’m sorry,” Michael said, stumbling over himself to help Alex move the three steps to the back of the truck. 

“Micheal, I’m fine,” Alex said, vaguely annoyed. “I just want to sit, I’m not going to collapse. That’s strike two.”

Michael held up his hands, exasperated. “Excuse me for caring.” 

“Sit.” Alex patted the truck bed next to him. “Come on, we need to be open with each other about this. You said you don’t want to screw this up. You’re worried about keeping us happy, aren’t you? Like, is that a desire or a fear?” 

Michael stepped back, already defensive. _ A fear, then _ , Alex thought. 

“Look, I wasn’t exactly looking forward to reliving childhood trauma on a  _ date _ , Alex—” 

Alex grabbed his arm, firmly, though not roughly, making him sit. 

“I'm sorry, Michael. I shouldn't have asked it like that. That’s not what this is about. I think you’re thoughtful and giving because of who you are, not because of what happened to you. I mean, I went through maybe a fraction of what you did as a kid and I’m a paranoid dick about it. After everything, you only want to be  _ kind _ . And I think that’s—well. Well, it’s fucked up. But beautiful.” 

Michael shrugged, feeling bad about his outburst, and unsure what to do with that compliment, if that was what that was. “I dunno. Maybe it’s different if you have alien powers and actually  _ could  _ enact your revenge fantasies.”

As if in illustration, the Christmas lights hanging up around the house twinkled menacingly. 

“Yeah, but you never did.”

“Not until two weeks ago,” Michael said, voice hard. 

“If everyone you loved hadn’t been there, you’d’ve let them kill you, Michael,” Alex said, voice harder. 

Michael looked away and didn’t say anything, and Alex coughed. The lights went back to normal.

“But, uh, okay. Sorry. That got… This was sort of supposed to be a kink discussion.” 

That surprised a laugh out of Michael. “A  _ what _ ?” 

“Please don’t be vanilla about this, you are literally dating two people,” Alex said, annoyed. “Maria thinks you like to be helpful, you want clear instructions and praise when you’ve done well.” 

“I mean...who doesn’t?” Michael said, eyes big. 

“Not a lot of people, actually. I hate taking orders, and I do it for a living. Praise just embarrasses me. Giving orders turns my crank, but only when I’m not working. Well, no, that’s a lie, but inappropriate boners at work from people calling me ‘sir’ would be a problem.” 

Michael smirked. “...You want me to call you ‘sir’?” 

Alex hummed, then shook his head. “With you, I’d want to earn it.” 

At that point Alex hopped up onto the truck bed and scooted back, popping  _ The Brave Little Toaster _ in, but he kept the sound way down. He settled against the back of the truck, inviting Michael to slide up next to him and under the covers. “I, ah, want you to feel safe. I want you to know that I’m happy with you, so that you know I’m not leaving. And I'm not leaving even if you make me mad. I...would like to know that I can make you feel safe.” 

Michael thought about that, and then shifted, leaning down, tucking himself under Alex’s arm, trying it out. It felt good, but it was still too early to tell if this was a  _ kink  _ or just normal-good. Michael didn’t really know enough about normal-good to judge. 

“I guess the whips and chains are more third-date stuff?” Jokes were always appropriate, right?

“You’re  _ horrible _ ,” Alex laughed, but he was playing with Michael’s hair. They watched the movie in silence for a bit before Alex said, “We’ll see. Maybe...if you’re good.” 

The change was almost imperceptible, but after a moment, Michael lifted his head. He was caught looking up at Alex, lips wet, movie forgotten. “I-I think I did like that.” 

“Thank God,” Alex breathed, grabbing Michael’s jaw and pulling him, finally, into a kiss. 

The movie forgotten, Michael flung an arm up around the back of Alex’s neck, pulling Alex down on top of him as they kissed. 

“Easy, Michael, I’m not going anywhere,” Alex gasped in between kisses, removing Michael’s arm from around his neck and pressing it to the truck bed firmly, holding him there, and—oh, yeah,  _ okay _ . He did like that. So Michael relaxed, and Alex hummed appreciatively, running his free hand down Michael’s chest. And he  _ really  _ liked that. 

Okay, kink unlocked. 

"I want to fuck you, Michael, is that okay?"

Michael grunted, already wrestling with his belt and jeans with his free hand. "I thought we just determined you don't have to  _ ask _ . I’m down for anything. Down To Fuck Guerin, that’s me."

"I mean, we didn't agree on a safeword or anything..." Alex scolded, taking Michael’s free hand pressing it, too, to the truck bed. 

Michael made a frustrated face and arched, breathing hard through his nose. "The  _ safeword  _ is me throwing you out of this truck with my brain," Michael gasped. " _ Please _ , Alex."

Alex paused, licking his lips, and Michael squirmed again, this time to get his attention. "Okay, I like it when you say please. Don’t move your hands.” 

Michael gripped the slick sleeping bag material under his head, grunting impatiently but staying there as Alex released his hold. The little smile Alex gave him was worth it, as was the way he ran a hand down the side of his whole body until Michael’s leg gave a ticklish kick. Alex laughed and bent to kiss him, unbuttoning his shirt slowly, now, taking his time. 

Michael grunted when Alex’s hands stayed above his belt, splaying cool over his belly and teasing his nipples. Now the whole truck bed felt like it was vibrating, and Michael wasn’t sure if he was doing that, or what. “Sometime tonight. Please.” 

“Ooh, I like your  _ bratty  _ ‘pleases’ even more,” Alex hummed wickedly.

Michael hit the heel of his boot into the truck bed with impatience. The wheels of the truck actually started spinning, kicking up dust. 

"You better watch those powers, alien boy," Alex told him. "Or you're not getting anything tonight."

“Fuck you,” Michael replied brazenly, but he did stop messing with the wheels on the truck, his eyes tracking Alex’s reaction with some apprehension. When Alex just laughed, Michael started kicking off his boots, sure that he could wriggle out of his jeans without the use of his hands if he needed to. 

“Actually, sweetheart, I’m going to fuck  _ you _ ,” Alex said, playful and condescending. Michael was squirming in earnest now, testing Alex’s (considerable) strength, but Alex palmed the front of Michael’s jeans, and he lost all pretense of struggle in a groan. 

“Bet you behave for Maria,” Alex growled, and, whoa,  _ that _ was doing something to his brain, hearing Alex talk about Maria like that, sending his thoughts into overdrive, though whether on pleasure or panic Michael couldn’t tell right away. 

Michael tried to think of something sassy to say back, stammering a few times before he managed, “Maybe she makes me.” 

He winced immediately, again checking Alex’s reaction to see if that was okay. Was that a challenge? A comparison? All those things you weren’t supposed to do in a threeway? Maybe he was messing this up, after all...

Suddenly deciding that was wrong, Michael sat up, almost clocking Alex in the nose. “A-Alex, I—i-ignore me, I thought…” 

“ _ Hey _ .” Alex only continued to stare at him benignly, pushing him down by his chest, keeping his voice even and calm. “I didn’t say you could move your hands, sweetheart.” 

“Fuck, I’m sorry,” Michael said, only just now noticing that his hands had moved. Now he  _ really  _ felt like he’d screwed up. 

But Alex was kissing him, sliding his hands up over his head again, so he must not have screwed up that badly? 

“It’s okay, Michael. Just relax. You’re doing fine, Michael,” Alex told him in between kisses. “Just let me explore, alright? I haven’t gotten to do this. Just...take my time with you.” 

“O-okay,” Michael said, trying to relax and settle in. What was his life that his girlfriend wanted him fast and hard and his boyfriend was the one who wanted to take it slow and sensual? There's stereotypes for you. He watched Alex kiss down his chest, lick his belly-button and bite down on his nipples until he was a squirming mess, his cock digging into his belt buckle painfully. “P-please, Alex.” 

“There, see, you  _ can  _ be polite,” Alex said, opening his belt. “Good boy.” 

Michael’s breath shuddered helplessly, and he went still. Alex was still holding his wrists down, in one hand. Probably a hold Michael could break—though, Alex was scarily stronger than he looked, so maybe not, not without his powers anyway—but it felt secure. Safe. 

“Lift your hips,” Alex said, dragging Michael’s jeans and underwear down his legs in a rough handful, leaving them bunched at his knees—as far as he could reach while still holding onto Michael’s wrists, and then he kissed him again, just leaving him naked in the breeze while his free hand was otherwise occupied with...something. 

That something was soon clear as Alex reached between Michael’s legs with slick fingers, ignoring his cock and circling his hole, rubbing lube over the area. 

“Fuck, oh, fuck,” Michael said, body tensing. The truck wheels spun again, a few rotations, and Alex stopped moving. 

"Sorry," Michael gasped, clenching his fists, angry with himself.

Alex grinned, bemused. “You alright?” 

“I’ll tell you in a minute,” Michael said. 

“Okay,” Alex chuckled. “You want to stop?” 

“No.”

“Slow down?” 

“Fuck, no.” 

“Oh, Guerin,” Alex purred, kissing his temple. “Just relax, then. I’ve got you. Lift your leg for me.” 

Body responding automatically, Michael lifted his leg up over Alex’s hip, as much as he could with his jeans still around his ankles, turning slightly on his side, and then he relaxed with a shudder as Alex’s fingers slipped inside him. It...didn’t hurt as much as he expected it to, and he relaxed still further. 

“ _ Good _ . Michael, you’re so good for me,” Alex said. 

Oh  _ no _ , now that felt really good. Sounded really good. All of this felt great to Michael, every point of contact, except for maybe the cool night air on his skin, but that was really just keeping him awake. Maybe this was all still just normal-good, but if Michael hadn’t been sold on the hold-me-down angle before, he was definitely interested in further experimentation now. 

“Alex, that—” Michael began to say, trying to  _ say _ how good this all felt, how grateful he was, how much he wanted more, but then Alex crooked his fingers and Michael nearly choked. Okay, wow,  _ hello _ , prostate. “ _ Oh holy mother of fuck, do that again _ ,” he demanded. 

“What, really?” Alex asked, seeming surprised, too, as he readjusted his fingers and pressed on the organ again. His brows knit with focus as Michael  _ whined _ , and he laughed a little breathlessly. “You’re...wow, really sensitive.” 

Michael gasped, body thrashing, and Alex had to give up holding his wrists, moving his free hand down to close around Michael’s throat, which also...did things. Wow, weren’t they all learning new kinks tonight? Several of the Christmas lights sparked out. “ _ Please _ .” 

“Okay, okay, easy. I’m gonna give it to you, just don’t kick. And try not to blow my generator. I got other things I'd much prefer you to blow,” Alex chuckled, looking like the smug bastard he was, completely unconcerned by Michael's powers fritzing, maybe even finding it cute. Michael grabbed Alex’s wrist where he was gripping his throat, and was so far beyond playing this at all cool, just half naked and strung out while a kids movie played in the background and his boyfriend took him apart just by gently fingering his ass. “I didn’t know you were this sensitive.” 

Michael didn’t, either. Did he have an extra alien sex organ in his ass that nobody’d ever found before? Michael certainly wasn’t thinking about asking Isobel or Max if they’d ever noticed anything because then Alex’s fingers were back inside him, and it was just a matter of  _ minutes  _ before he was coming hard all over Alex’s lap, cock completely untouched. 

“Oh my God,” Alex chuckled, awed, continuing to touch Michael there while he panted, and finding he didn’t pull away, over-sensitive, and he was actually still hard. The truck wasn't vibrating anymore, like the energy or tension had bled off. The sounds of crickets could be heard again. 

Michael just blinked up at him, dazed, as Alex continued to thrust his fingers in and out of him. 

“Holy shit, you’re amazing, Guerin,” Alex said, kissing him again, more desperate this time, his own arousal suddenly becoming urgent watching Michael fall apart for him. “Come here. Can you ride me? I want you to ride me. Can you move?” 

Michael nodded, wordless, feeling drunk or high from this. His mind was buzzing pleasantly, not wandering, but oddly focused. Oddly...happy. That was new. Jesus, that was  _ new _ , feeling like he’d done good, that he was good. That was a new kind of happy.  _ Move? _ He thought about saying, but they were watching the wrong film for that reference. _ If you want I could fly.  _

“Get your pants off, baby,” Alex said, and Michael, finding himself released, kicked out of all of his clothes immediately, back in Alex’s lap before Alex even had a condom on. Alex grinned, tossing a blanket around Michael’s shoulders. “We’re learning a lot about you tonight.” 

“You going to make fun of me after making me come like  _ that _ ?” Michael asked, vaguely wounded, but too sex-addled to care. 

“Not at all, sweetheart. Come here. Maria’s going to be thrilled, and so am I.” 

Alex continued to finger him open, adding more and more lube and stretching him with three fingers as Michael got into position. This was really more acrobatic than he wanted, but it was what Alex wanted, and Michael’s brain was getting drunk off giving Alex what he wanted. 

"Tell me, do your powers go haywire for all the girls, or am I special?" Alex began, teasing. 

Michael actually  _ growled _ . " _ You _ made me lose control, you son of a bitch."

Alex laughed. "Okay, okay, that time I was teasing you, I'm sorry. Come here. Don’t be impatient. Go slow, I’ve got you,” Alex praised, grasping Michael’s hips as Michael began to lower himself down onto his cock. 

Michael’s brow creased with concentration more than pain, hands braced on Alex’s shoulders as he slid down the length of him and then back up. He didn’t find that (alien prostate?) organ again, which was maybe a good thing, because this was still ordinary good sex and didn’t scramble Michael’s brains. He could actually remember to kiss Alex like this, and remember to breathe, and move, and Alex fisting his cock actually felt  _ good  _ instead of unnecessary, and they came together, Alex just a bit before him, and they collapsed, panting against the cabin of the truck. Michael’s breath fogged the back window. 

“Oh my God,” Alex said, and laughed, once he had enough breath, and he tugged Michael into his arms and kissed him. “Michael, you—you’re amazing, you know that?” 

“Fuck, you’re the one who made me come twice,” Michael replied, totally boneless where he was draped over Alex. 

“Yeah, but you’re easy,” Alex replied, rubbing Michael’s back. 

Michael just hummed and dozed, right there on Alex’s lap. 

“We’re going to have to tell Maria,” Alex said eventually, when the movie had run out and Michael stirred again. “First, to nail all the furniture down…"

"I hate you."

Alex ignored this, getting up and zipping himself up so he could start putting the DVD projector away. "You ready to have your girlfriend’s fingers up your ass?” 

Michael had the decency to blush as he pulled on sticky clothes to make their way inside. 

“D-T-F, man,” he said, his bravado returning, encouraged by all the happy. He saw Alex struggling vaguely getting everything down from the truck, and scrambled to action. “Oh, hang on, let me get—”

“ _ Michael _ ,” Alex said sternly, from where he was standing on the truck bed unplugging the projector. “The line where you want to be helpful or submissive and where you don’t want to let me do things because I have a prosthetic leg needs to be firmer, understand? Get that square in your head.” 

“Uh,” Michael said, desperately embarrassed. “Yes, sir?” 

But that made Alex laugh as he turned back to the projector, shaking his head. “Don’t try to butter me up. That’s still three strikes.”

“...What happens on three strikes?” Michael asked, trying not to feel gutted by this, while something else stirred excitedly in him at the warning tone in Alex’s voice that made him realize maybe there was something to this kink thing that was more than just normal-good. 

“I haven’t decided yet. Maybe you just need a spanking.” 

Michael laughed in disbelief, but Alex seemed fairly serious. 

Still, no discipline was forthcoming as they got ready for bed. Michael was curled up in Alex’s bed, on fresh sheets, staring at Alex’s prosthetic leg while Alex got ready for bed on his crutches, and he definitely didn’t offer to help him with anything. Alex tucked himself in, left the crutches within easy reach, and then turned towards Michael. 

“On the desk in the den, there’s a sharpie or some permanent marker. Bring me that.” 

Though he was totally naked, Michael threw himself out of bed gladly, though he tried to play this cool when he returned with the marker. “You gonna smack me with a sharpie?” 

As someone who’d definitely experienced corporal punishment before—from a ruler and a belt—this didn’t sound like a kink he was going to be into, but a marker probably wouldn’t hurt that much and Michael was willing to give anything a try. 

“No,” Alex said. “I don’t want to spank you angry. I’m going to ask Maria to do it. Turn over.” 

“Uh.  _ What _ ?” Michael asked, interest piquing, already rolling over onto his stomach. 

“I’m going to leave her a note.” 

“Oh my  _ God _ ,” Michael said, burying his face in his arms and laughed when he felt the wet scrape of marker across his left ass cheek, and then his right. “What are you saying?” 

“It says, ‘spank him, he knows why,’” Alex said, capping the marker. Part of him wanted to slide the marker into that inviting, mysterious asshole, fuck him with it until he came again, but Alex tossed it on the bedside table and turned out the light. 

Michael was quiet for a minute, tingling with anticipation, and something else, something more uncomfortable, and not in a good way. He shifted to pull the covers up over his shoulders, and reached for Alex in the darkness. “I’m sorry, I—I didn’t mean to make you angry...” 

Alex sighed, opening his arms so Michael could tuck himself against his shoulder. “No, I’m not. Annoyed, maybe. It’s alright, I know you don’t mean it like that, and I know you’ll get better. Is it alright if she spanks you?”

Michael grinned. “Yeah. If I get nun flashbacks and call out  _ Ave Maria! _ she can’t be offended.” 

“ _ Oh my God _ , Michael,” Alex laughed nervously, and then squeezed him. “I’m sorry. That was maybe too much. A little too real for both of us. I’ll wash it off in the morning.” 

“No, don’t,” Michael said, giggling a little, too. “I wanna try. Who knows, I might like it so much you’ll have to figure out something else as an  _ actual  _ punishment so I won’t just act out for attention.” 

Alex really laughed, then, rolling over and throwing his leg over Michael’s legs, pinning him to the mattress. “You really are a lot to handle.”

“Good thing there’s two of you.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Powers going haywire idea from mythras_fire, the rest of these freaky kinks from my own brain.


	13. Chapter 13

“He left me a  _ note _ ?” 

Michael blushed, relaxing facedown on Maria’s bed, now that the jig was up. It was late morning, which was like after work for Maria. Michael was still only doing part-time at the salvage yard, so he didn’t need to be at work until noon, and since Maria didn’t work until later, it was the perfect time to hang out with her. 

Which was how he found himself dressed and out one door and in another door and undressed again by 9 in the morning. 

“On your ass. He left me a note on your ass.” Maria cackled. “I didn’t believe it but…” she swatted him with an open palm, playfully. “There it is.” 

Michael sat up on his elbows, bending his knee to turn to face her. Maria’s hair was still wrapped up in a silk bonnet thing, and she was wearing an oversized shirt and nothing else, and boy, Michael liked the look. 

“I think it’s kinda hot. It’s like the kinky adult version of teacher pinning a note to your shirt for your parents.” 

“You’re so weird,” Maria laughed. “And now that’s never coming out of my brain, thanks. You going to tell me what you did?” 

“ _ Nothing _ ,” Michael said petulantly, on reflex, but almost immediately he corrected himself. “I kept trying to—worry, about him. About his leg. Do things for him.” 

“Now, see I think that’s kind of sweet,” Maria said, playing with Michael’s hair, “but I can see how he’d be annoyed by that. So what do you say to 10 good swats?”

Michael grinned, going flat and spreading his legs invitingly. “Make ‘em count.” 

The first smacks were experimental, one on each cheek. Michael sucked in a breath, but didn’t flinch. 

“How’s that?” 

“Fine,” Michael said. Then, “Harder. You can go harder.” 

Maria hummed. “You like the pain, or you want me to leave a mark?” 

“Figuring that out.” 

“Count for me,” Maria said, and hit him four more times, her hand stinging, and his ass turning a nice pink.

“Six,” Michael said, breathing harder. He was rolling his hips idly against the bed, so this was very clearly doing something for him. 

Also, the twenty thousand knick knacks on her dresser and bedside table and shelves were starting to float without him actually activating his telekinesis. 

“Pain’s...interesting,” he decided. Especially if it made his usually very tight control on his powers slip. 

Maria leaned down and kissed the base of his spine, and then bit him, pinching skin between her teeth. Michael hissed and arched into it, and all the knick knacks clattered back into place, like Maria’s touch brought him back under control.

Maria gasped and sat up. "What just—"

"Sorry, fuck," Michael said, burying his face in the pillow. He’d done it  _ again _ . "I don't know what's—why I'm—"

Maria rubbed the back of his neck. "It's fine, sweetheart. You're okay. Alex told me you got a little...excited last night?"

"I—guess so?"

"You getting excited for me, Guer?" She asked, and smacked him twice more. 

Michael grunted, enduring. “Yes. No, I mean, I like it—I like. Ah. Eight. I like when you..." 

“You like letting me take control?” 

“ _ Yeah _ . God, yeah,” Michael said, hiding his face again. “Makes me fucking lose it.”

She really hauled off and hit him on the last two, until Michael cried out and arched off the bed, eyes flashing and sending several things spiraling around the room in a whirlwind. 

Maria wrestled him over, the bedspread stinging his ass, and crawled into his lap to kiss him, and all at once everything spinning in the room dropped to the floor. Something broke, even, but Maria didn’t seem like she cared.

“Well,  _ I _ like leaving a mark.” 

“I like letting you,” Michael drawled. 

She kissed him right on the crease between his eyes when he winced, and then rolled them both over together, pulling him on top of her. “You’re unbelievable, Guerin. Come on and fuck me, handsome. Condom’s on the dresser. Unless you threw them somewhere.” 

“I did  _ not _ .” Michael asked, rolling the condom on. He paused and smiled down at her. “How’d I get so lucky?” 

“You’re due some good luck,” Maria whispered, biting his neck again as he slid slowly into her. She was definitely ready for him, slick and hot and most of all  _ wanting  _ him. 

“N-not this much,” Michael gasped as he moved in her, finding the rhythm that made her moan.  _ He _ had been ready to come the moment he was in her, but he held out, wanting to see her happy, wanting to be the one to make her happy. 

“You do, you make me so happy, baby. I love you,” Maria said, like she heard his thoughts, and hell, maybe she did. She was psychic, wasn’t she? “Fuck me like the good boy I know you are.” 

It almost made Michael come apart, almost start crying, the things she said to him, things he didn’t deserve, but instead he buried his face against her neck and came, feeling something too-tight loosen inside of him. Maybe it was his TK settling down, maybe he just finally  _ believed  _ her when she said she loved him. 

“That’s good, you’re so good, Michael,” Maria hummed, rubbing the back of his neck and letting him catch his breath. 

“I…” Michael began, ready to say  _ I love you _ even if he wasn’t really ready, but she cut him off:

“And when you’re done, you can finish me off.” 

“Aw, shit, sorry!” Michael gasped, and laughed, embarrassed. “You cheated. Being nice to me to make me come is cheating.”

“I know, my God, you’re so easy. A little spanking and a little ‘good boy’ and you just fall to piec—ahh!  _ Guerin _ !” Maria shrieked, as Michael started tickling her. “Oh, you’re bad! Bad, bad! Ah!” 

He didn’t stop until she wrapped her legs around his head, and he settled into licking her open. She tasted faintly of latex, but that was quickly gone. He loved her little noises, and movements, and how quickly she came for him once she had his undivided attention. 

He loved it so much he just stayed down there for another round. 

When she finally had to push him out the door for work, most of the permanent marker had washed off in the shower. But Maria didn’t like how his boxers covered up the marks her hand had made, so she sent him to work wearing a pair of her panties instead. 

...

As uncomfortable as it was, riding up between his ass cheeks, Michael was weirdly grateful for the lacey blue thong all day. 

It reminded him that this was all  _ real _ , that the last two days—hell, the last week—hadn’t been a dream. His practically bare ass stung a little against his jeans, but it was more sensation than anything, and he  _ definitely  _ liked that. And even with the thong and the tender ass reminding him every second, he could barely believe it.

He paused for a break at four, sweating like crazy in the hot sun scrapping engine parts, to find his phone lit up with texts, and not just from Isobel, like usual. Oh, Isobel was responsible for some of them, but 8 texts was unheard of for him to get unless someone was dead. But no one was. 

_ Isobel: did you really tell Kyle I could impregnate him?? _

_ Maria: hey babe just thinking of you  _

_ Maria: and your ass _

_ Maria: wanna make sure ur ok _

_ Maria: we gotta talk about it tonight. Ok? Call me or come over. Love you _

_ Isobel: Michael Guerin answer me. I'm going to kill you. It's not funny.  _

_ Alex: Don't know if Maria texted you, but come to the Pony after work. We want to have a conversation together, but you'll come home with me again tonight. _

_ Alex: If that's okay?  _

Michael smiled dumbly at his phone, not even knowing how to respond to all this. He drank some water and went back to work for an hour instead.

When he’d finally worked up the courage to reply, Michael opened a text to Alex, and tried a few replies, but didn't like any of them because it was hard to be funny when Alex was so earnest. 

He tried Maria, and also didn't know what to say that wasn't just ‘Yes, ma'am.’ 

Frustrated, he added Maria and Alex to a group text. 

_ Michael: Can we have a group text? I'll be at the Pony after work, but I have a chance to put in overtime. 7 ok? _

Maria's text came in first. 

_ Maria: works for me. definitely DON’T shower first you dirty boy. ;) _

Michael grinned and put his phone away to get back to work. Later, when he checked it, there were a few new texts. 

_ Alex: Gross, DeLuca, what did you do to him. _

_ Maria: gotta wait til 7 apparently.  _

Feeling happier than he could ever remember feeling, Michael texted Isobel back, mostly as an afterthought. 

_ Michael: don’t worry i think he’ll make a fine mother  _


	14. Chapter 14

Michael rolled in well after 7, because he really did have extra work to get done, and getting paid hourly meant that really did matter. 

“You’re late,” Alex said, as Michael slid into a barstool next to him. He was already exhausted, but something about being around these two, in their proximity, reinvigorated him. 

“And you’re going to regret Maria not letting me shower first, I am  _ ripe  _ today,” Michael replied. 

Maria was down at the other end of the bar, so Michael leaned forward to reach across the bar to sneak the nearest glass and tap. He really needed a beer. 

Alex made a noise of surprise, but when Michael returned with something cool and clear and fizzy—he’d hit the light beer tap on accident, but didn’t care at this point—Alex’s eyes weren’t on the pilfered beer but were tracking his ass. He must’ve caught the flash of blue lace as his shirt rode up in the back. 

Michael snorted foam. 

“Little present from DeLuca,” he said quietly, almost a smugly, squirming in his seat as he remembered how the thong was actually permanently indented into the crease of his balls. “She likes the look of my spanked ass in girls panties. What about you?” 

“Uh,” Alex said, actually unable to formulate a sentence, and Michael saw that he was blushing like crazy, that this was really turning his crank in a way he didn’t expect it to. “Uh, yeah, it’s—they’re—”

“Wait til you see him with his pants off,” Maria said, returning down to their end of the bar with her hands full of pint glasses. She kissed Michael on the lips, but quickly. “Ooh, got that unwashed man smell on ya. I dunno, Manes, you might have to fight me for him tonight.” 

“Pretty sure I can take you in a fight, DeLuca,” Alex said, recovering slightly. “Long as you don’t uh, scramble my brains with—with, ah—”

Maria laughed, on her way with the dishes again, and down to take someone else’s order. 

Alex coughed, recovering his dignity. “You eaten yet?” 

“Nope. Weren’t we gonna talk?” 

“There’s a food truck outside. I’ll bring in some tacos. Maria said she could take her break whenever you got here, but maybe we should eat first.” Alex stood up, ignoring Michael’s move for his wallet. 

Michael didn’t try to protest, this time. Instead, he acquiesced. “Sure. I’ll eat anything.”

Alex granted him a warm smile at that. “I know you will, Guerin.” 

…

They gathered in the back room, on that turquoise couch he and Maria had fucked on just—God, was it really just  _ yesterday _ ? Michael smiled at the memory. And at how fast things were moving. He liked fast. 

Alex and Maria sat next to each other, and while Michael was trying to figure out where he was supposed to sit, Alex gestured vaguely. “Alright, turn around. Let’s see it.” 

“It?” Michael huffed, half in shock, half in amusement. He could feel his face going red. “What, now? Here?” 

“Maria’s only got 15 minutes, so, yeah,” Alex explained sternly, gesturing for him to turn around again. “To be clear, this is not foreplay. Just drop your pants, Guerin.” 

“Who are you kidding, this is objectification at it’s finest!” Maria told him with a chuckle. “Give us a show, baby.” 

“Oh yeah,  _ right _ ,” Michael said, recovering some of his dignity, but he did turn around. As a form of protest he dropped his jeans to his knees as  _ unsexily  _ as he could manage, but there was no mistaking Alex’s gasp of delight and Maria’s satisfied hum. Michael felt vaguely humiliated, like so much meat on display, but found he...didn’t exactly hate it. He picked the wedgie out from behind his balls and grinned. “You like what you see?” 

“Yeah,  _ fuck _ ,” Alex said.

“Good boy,” Maria agreed. “You can pull up your pants now.” 

When Michael turned back around, jeans fastened again, at least everyone had the decency to be blushing. 

“O-okay, now we talk,” Alex said, attempting to take control of the situation. 

“You wanna sit on my lap, baby?” Maria asked, opening her arms. 

Michael moved forward instinctively, and then shook his head. 

“I want to be able to look at both of you. What’re we expecting to cover in fifteen minutes?” Michael asked, sprawling in a rusty old folding chair he moved to sit across from them, close enough that their knees touched. “Maria spanked me and liked it. What’s there to talk about?” 

“Yes, but did  _ you  _ like it?” Alex pressed, looking frustrated but trying not to show it. “That’s what we’re here to talk about. Just because you seem to like the dominance/submission spectrum of things, doesn’t mean you’re as into the sadism/masochism side, and, I’m sorry, Michael, but I don’t exactly trust you to police or...or respect, or even know your own boundaries.” 

Maria laid a hand on Alex’s knee. 

“We checked in,” she assured him, “before, during, and after. But, you’re right. It’s not like Michael’s  _ never  _ said yes to something he didn’t want just to make someone else happy.” 

This last bit was sarcastic, almost nasty, except, when Michael looked between her and Alex, he realized they all knew what that was like. They all had done it, in their own ways.

“I’m not into pain,” Michael said, abruptly. “But, uh. It works as punishment. Always has. I never—I’ve never picked a barfight I didn’t deserve, you know. Sometimes it just, it makes me—quiet.”

Maria nodded. She got it.

Alex’s mind went somewhere else. He swallowed, uncertain whether he should bring it up, but even Michael could see all the alarms going off in Alex’s head, and it didn’t take a genius to figure out what they were pointing to. “Your hand. You—you know you didn’t— _ deserve _ that, right?” 

“Nah.” Michael shrugged. He didn’t want Alex feeling bad about it, definitely not anymore. “I guess I thought—I think I thought about that as a—as a price to pay. There’s always a price.” 

Then he looked up, and Alex was still frowning, so he gave them both a wry smile, clearly intended to make them feel better: “Like today. I  _ did  _ like how my ass felt all day.” 

Maria laughed wetly, and sniffed. “So you are a kinky boy.” 

“Oh, definitely,” Michael said, and now the smile reached his eyes. “It—it just felt good to feel your hand on me all day, I guess. And this god damned  _ thong— _ ”

Maria laughed as he shifted again.

“—made me really appreciate what girls go through.”

“Good,” Maria said, and took his hand and squeezed it. “Okay, so: not into recreational pain. But you said you liked  _ letting  _ me do it to you. And you liked the underwear.”

Michael laughed, embarrassed. “Yeah.” 

“So...into humiliation and submission, and, what, sensation play? Or was it the 24/7 aspect?” Alex speculated, suddenly businessy again. Michael flushed a little, not sure what Alex meant by ‘24/7.’ Alex took pity on him: “Did you like the sensation itself, or what it meant?”

“...I don’t know. Both. More what it meant, I guess.” 

“I know I  _ definitely  _ like watching you squirm whenever you sit down,” Maria said. “But there’s other ways of doing that.” 

“Really? I mean, you—you  _ like  _ that?” 

“Oh, yeah,” Alex said, letting out a breath and leaning back. 

“Definitely,” Maria said, resting her head against Alex’s shoulder. 

They looked perfect together, perfectly comfortable and in love in with each other in every way you could be in love with someone that wasn’t sexually. Michael was almost sad to be breaking up the band for the night. 

_ Almost _ . 

“So I’ve gotta fuck him harder, apparently,” Alex chuckled. 

“Me, too,” Maria agreed, giggling. 


	15. Chapter 15

“We didn’t even talk about what  _ you  _ guys like,” Michael said from the passenger seat of Alex’s SUV. He was leaving his truck overnight at the Pony, since Alex was probably going to bring him by in the morning again. That, too, felt like a big step. Driving together. Letting Alex drive. 

What a metaphor.

Alex chuckled warmly, reaching across the space between them to grasp Michael’s hand. “Michael, I think our conversation tonight established you’ll do anything we ask. What  _ we  _ like is hardly the issue when we know you’ll give us what we want. That’s...part of what we like.”

Michael slid back in the seat, body sloppy and loose. “Well then you better give me nice, clear instructions. You know. What  _ I _ like.” 

Alex took his eyes off the road to raise an eyebrow at Michael, who was grinning, and sounding way too sarcastic and nonchalant about this to not be deadly serious, but also talking like someone who didn’t know how to talk about how he felt unless he was making fun of himself. 

“You’re being a brat,” Alex finally concluded, tightening his grip on the steering wheel. 

“Trying,” Michael said. Turned out it was harder to do that when people were nice to you. Still, if they were already messing around: “Maybe I just need a firm hand.” 

Silence fell in the cabin: a charged silence. Michael could tell Alex was trying to figure out what to say, or maybe how to say it, so he kept quiet, didn’t move, not wanting to interrupt or give him an excuse to chicken out. The sound of Alex inhaling made his heart beat faster. 

“I want your mouth on my dick, Guerin. Right now.” 

Michael huffed. Whatever he had expected, it wasn’t that. And  _ oh _ , did the order go straight to his dick. “What, now? While you’re  _ driving _ ?”

“You heard me,” Alex said, all hard lines, the nerves only showing slightly at the edges of his mouth. Michael found it made an irresistible picture. 

“And I’m not arguing,” Michael said, raising his hands, and then shifting over, body following the curves of the bucket seats and the center console. This wasn’t going to be comfortable, but he could do it. “I just didn’t think you’d ever ask for road head while—”

“Not  _ head _ ,” Alex corrected. “I just want your mouth on my dick, so I can get some peace and quiet. Anything more distracting might get us killed. You can suck me off once we’re at my place. I just want you to keep my dick warm. And keep your seatbelt on.”

Now Michael’s insides really were melting, because, fuck, that was—that was really weirdly hot, and Michael found himself salivating. 

“Uh. Okay.”

“We okay?” Alex asked. 

Michael vaguely recognized it—past the buzzing of  _ yes yes oh god yes please _ in his brain, drowning out the  _ why is this so hot? _ —as checking in. 

“ _ Yes _ . Fucking. Green-yes,” Michael said, getting horizontal between the seats and half in Alex’s lap. 

Alex deigned to raise his elbows a bit, but didn’t otherwise help as Michael straddled the space and eased Alex’s zipper down, fishing in his boxers until he found Alex’s half-hard cock. He had to support himself on the seat below Alex with both arms so he couldn’t really guide him into his mouth.

“No teeth. And keep your lips sealed, I don’t want you drooling on my jeans,” Alex said, though it was a bit late for that.

Michael giggled for some reason, shifting to try to find a more comfortable position. If the fucking girls underwear and spanking and strip tease weren’t enough, being a warm mouth around Alex’s cock was definitely making him hard enough to show in his jeans. It was also doing something new and possibly wonderful to how his brain functioned. Quieting him.

Alex laid a hand on the back of his head, and Michael actually hummed. 

“Oh, baby, you really  _ do  _ smell good. And you feel good. Can you take me just a little deeper?” He pressed just slightly on Michael’s neck, and Michael dutifully swallowed a little more, keeping his lips tightly sealed. And actually, here, he could rest his forehead a little on Alex’s thigh, making the position a little more comfortable. “Man, I’m never going to be able to drive again without thinking of this… Your mouth and some peace and quiet.”

Michael winced as Alex tugged a curl to get his attention. He must’ve been zoning, lulled by the sound of Alex’s voice and the hand on the back of his neck. “No tongue action, sweetheart. Save that for later, okay? Only ten more miles to go.” 

Michael made some sort of noise of affirmation, trying to get a little more comfortable. His comfort wasn’t the point, though, of course, and weirdly, it got him there like how the after-effects of the spanking got him there, just, kept him focused on where he was physically, enough that his brain didn’t want to overthink anything else. He was so hard he was going to bust through his jeans at any point, he was sure. 

“Good boy. God, you’re so good, Guerin,” Alex said, massaging the back of his neck. 

It came as a surprise when there was a final turn and the car slowed down, and Alex threw it into park. 

“Alright, come here.” Alex slid the seat back, letting Michael slither out of his seatbelt and into the footwell. “Make me come.”

Micheal had to tilt his head back to swallow the drool that had accumulated in his mouth, but then he was back in business, hands rushing to get Alex’s pants open the rest of the way and swallowing him down like a porn star through sheer unpracticed enthusiasm. Alex didn’t last long, and Michael was maybe a little proud of his skills when he flooded his mouth after only a few minutes of sucking and tongue action. 

“Fuck, fuck!” Alex grunted, gripping Michael’s hair and forcing him down so far Michael actually gagged a little—but of course he liked that too, apparently—and then released him and collapsed back against the seat, panting. “Oh my God, Guerin.”

Michael pulled off and wiped his mouth. Of course he’d swallowed—on some level didn’t have much choice—and he was grinning. “I guess that was as good for you as it was for me?” 

“Jesus, Michael,” Alex laughed, leaning down to kiss him, cupping his cheeks. “What am I gonna do with you?”

“Chain me to your bed and never let me leave?” Michael suggested with a grin. 

Alex’s smile reached his eyes in a way his smiles almost never did. “Oh, sweetheart. I just might. Throw away the key.” 

“Give it to Maria.”

Alex laughed. “How about we go inside, you hop in the shower, and I’ll see what I can come up with. K?”

“That a genuine question, or an order?” Micheal asked, chuckling. Alex was petting his hair and his face, wiping his mouth and eyes tenderly. “Because if I have a choice I’d rather not try to walk anywhere with this boner.” 

“Sorry, Guerin, not a question. I’ll be more clear. Go inside, strip down, clothes in hamper. Shower, brush teeth, condom on. And if I catch you touching your dick more than that requires, I’ll add to what Maria gave you.”

Michael grunted, but he couldn’t deny that that was hot, too. He slithered back to his side of the car and got out. “Fine.” 

This gave Alex a bit of a breather, first, to text Maria:

_ Alex: How tf do I launder girls underwear? Do I hand wash this?  _

_ Alex: Also, we need to buy more. For G. Holy shit. I hate you. _

He wouldn’t get a text back for a while, so he set his phone aside and reached for a box under the bed. He didn’t have an extensive collection of toys, having only recently been back Stateside and not really knowing he was into this Dom shit until very, very recently, but he had some padded cheapo handcuffs that must have come in a Valentines Day pack of some kind at some point, and he did have one very well-trusted vibrating plug. That would have to do for tonight, and then—then yeah, they might actually have to drive to fucking Albuquerque or somewhere for an anonymous and big enough sex shop because...yeah. 

Maria’s text buzzed through, surprising him. 

_ Maria: I KNOW RIGHT?! That ass was made for panties. I hate boxers on dudes anyway so if I have one that lets me dress him up... _

_ Maria: Cold gentle is fine, but those were on their way out of the rotation anyway, so if they’re trashed just toss them. I’ll see what else I’ve got in the meantime.  _

Alex paused, taking a steadying breath before letting his fingers say what he probably could never say out loud, especially not to his best friend. 

_ Alex: Is it weird if the idea of him wearing your used panties does it for me even more? Let’s go shopping for *you* and give him your hand-me-downs. _

_ Maria: Who even are you LMAO!!! I’m blushing at work, Alexander Manes!! _

_ Alex: I don’t fcking know. Wait til you hear what I made him do on the car ride. Text you tomorrow so I don’t totally distract you. Love ya.  _

_ Maria: Great, something to masturbate to. Love you too babe <3 <3  _

By this time, Michael was waiting in the doorway, and Alex beamed at him. He was damp and naked and gorgeous, his cock standing proud and already wearing a condom (this would make for easy cleanup, but if it had the effect of making Michael hope he might get to fuck something, that was fun, too). His eyes flicked to the cuffs and plug on the bed and then back to Alex.

“Your girlfriend has a filthy mind,” Alex said with a smile, patting the bed next to him. 

“Yeah, so does my boyfriend. Should I be worried?” Michael asked, licking his lips. He obviously hadn’t failed to notice the toys on the bed. 

“I don’t think so,” Alex said. “Would you let me cuff you to the headboard with these? To try it out—see how we like it—”

“Yes—”

“—before we get anything more heavy-duty. Maybe a lock you can’t break?” 

Here Michael looked uncertain, which Alex immediately picked up on. 

“O-or not, sorry. But something more serious than these flimsy—anyway. Just trying them out. If you want.” 

“Yeah,  _ yeah _ , I wanna try—I just don’t think...” Michael said, shaking himself. “Handcuffs now, talk later?” 

“Sure,” Alex said, cupping Michael’s jaw to kiss him until he relaxed again. Then and only then did he close one of the cuffs around Michael’s wrist. 

Oh, and Michael  _ shivered _ for him just at that, going all loose and permissive. It made Alex’s heart swell and ache.

Alex hummed appreciatively, but he pulled back from the kiss to smile, almost laugh at him. “You’d think, all the times you’ve been arrested, that this wouldn’t do anything for you.” 

Michael just shrugged, grinning hugely, just as bewildered as Alex. “It’s different,” was all he said. 

Alex didn’t want to ruin the moment, reminding himself that they would talk later. Instead he grinned, just a little sharply. “Well I certainly hope so.” 

Michael giggled, letting himself relax into it as Alex moved him to the headboard and looped the short chain around one of the sturdy rungs. Alex was smiling, too, that predatory smile that Michael loved so much being on the receiving end of, and Michael let him close the cuff around his other wrist so his hands were above his head. 

"Guess I shoulda made sure I still had the keys for this thing before I locked you up," Alex said, maybe 90% joking.

Michael just raised an eyebrow and flexed his brain, unclicking them briefly before locking them again around his wrists—a little tighter. 

"Oho, I see," Alex said. "You better not let yourself go until I say you can, Guerin."

"That’s the idea," Michael replied. "Don't keep me waiting."

Alex laughed. "See, I thought this little arrangement means I give the orders." 

Michael clenched his fists and grunted as Alex's hand trailed over his chest, just teasing again. 

"Just relax," Alex said, slightly kinder, but voice still firm. He ran his hand down to Michael's cock and gave it a few quick jerks, but stopped almost immediately, holding down Michael's hip when he whined and bucked up into his hand. 

"Roll over," Alex said more sternly. 

Michael glared at him and then complied. 

Of course, Alex forgot how the sight of Michael's ass, still just a little bruised and red from Maria's hand this morning, would affect him, and Alex was really glad he had already come once tonight. Maybe someday they might indulge in some edgeplay and he could just come all over Michael's back and leave him desperate, but Alex figured the relationship was still too new for that now. 

"I'm gonna open you up, okay? Get on your knees and elbows, no humping the sheets."

"You gotta ruin all the fu—un!" Michael grunted, Alex's fingers buried in him before he even got all the way up. He immediately dropped his face to the pillow, letting out a muffled, "Fuck."

He was pretty sure the bed moved. 

Alex smiled, rubbing up and down his spine with one hand while he fucked Michael open with his fingers with the other. 

"You know I'm thinking about how to tell Maria about this," he said, in a conversational tone that was 85% frustrating for Michael and 100% brain scorchingly hot. "Do I just text her? Like, hey, you should try spelunking in your boyfriend's asshole, see how hot it gets him. Or maybe we try exploring you together. Tie you down like this and take turns fingering you. Experimenting on you.”

"You wanna roleplay alien autopsy?" Michael grunted, but the tension poured out of him as the pain of stretching gave way to its own kind of pleasure, and Alex hadn't even touched his prostate yet. He laughed. " _ Together _ ?” 

“We might work out an arrangement. Think you can behave?” Here Alex brushed his prostate, or whatever way oversensitive organ he had that passed for one, making his hips skitter helplessly forward. 

"Fuck! Yes, obviously."

"Maybe the kinky stuff is too much for you. Might overheat your little green brain," Alex teased, getting into it, even though this was kind of new dirty talk territory for him. For one thing, Alex had never been into dirty talk before, not until he saw how thoroughly it wrecked Michael, how much Michael needed it. “Maybe we should just keep things vanilla. How was your day, dear? Let’s exchange handjobs and roll over and go to sleep.” 

“You know I’m down for anything,” Michael whined, whole body shuddering as Alex found that organ and circled it just with the tip of one finger. But he must not have been that out of it because he lifted his head and looked back at Alex with a wicked grin: “But you wouldn’t want me to get bored and destructive, would you? I might chew on your shoes, or flirt with other people in bars...” 

Though he meant it to be funny, Michael was briefly a little worried he was going too far with that, but Alex must have thought it was so far from the realm of possibility that he laughed. 

“Right. Gotta make sure you’ve got plenty of toys to keep you busy, right?” 

And maybe Michael had a comeback for that, but then Alex’s fingers were gone, and something blunt and cool was pressing against his entrance—something almost too big, and Michael sucked in a breath to warn Alex, but then it was in, tapering and flaring out again at the base. Oh, right. The plug.  _ Fuck _ , Michael thought, really hoping to be fucked at some point. Maybe he was wearing the condom because Alex was going to let him fuck him? 

Alex rested a hand at the center of Michael’s back. “This should keep you busy while I get ready for bed. No coming without permission.” 

“What—” Michael began, and then Alex did something, flipped a switch or something, and the toy inside him began to  _ vibrate _ . 

“Oh Jesus fucking Christ!” Michael said, shooting upright, stopped short by the handcuffs. He had just enough presence of mind to not unlock them automatically with his brain, and he crumpled back to the bed, whimpering. It felt so good. Way too good. He was sure he could come from just this, cock untouched, but—but he wasn’t allowed? Fuck. “Fuck fuck fuck.” 

“Be good, now,” Alex said, patting Michael gently on the ass before he got up to wash his hands and get ready for bed. 

And Michael was good, even as he heard Alex taking his sweet fucking time brushing his teeth and fucking flossing and whatever else he did before bed that took ninety years. Michael didn’t begrudge him the time spent on his leg, that was fair, but flossing? And why did the man brush his hair  _ before  _ bed? Michael loved this fussy asshole, but Jesus, he was right on the edge and desperate and he didn’t want to screw this up, so he was practically in tears when Alex returned. 

“Hey, baby,” he said, turning off the vibrator and rubbing Michael’s back when he whined. “Wow, you really did wait for me. Good job.” 

Michael definitely wasn’t in a place where he could give a verbal answer, so he just groaned something vaguely affirmative, and pressed his fists to his eyeballs. 

“Gonna fuck you now, and I want you to come whenever, but I’m gonna keep fucking you until I do, okay?” Alex explained, and Michael nodded, panting for it, salivating for it. 

Michael actually came as Alex was removing the plug, he was so on edge. 

But Alex just laughed and fucked into him, not rough—but not exactly gently, either. 

And Michael was  _ still hard _ , somehow. 

“That’s it, good boy,” Alex was saying, not really noticing that yet, but noticing how Michael had relaxed, gone all pliant, so that Alex was the one holding his hips up. The reacharound was instinctive, once he got into a rhythm, forgetting that Michael had already come—and he huffed, surprised. 

“I thought you came?” 

“I  _ did _ ,” Michael whined. 

“Do you need to again?” 

“I—I don’t—yes?”

“Fucking alien stamina,” Alex laughed. “Okay, new experiment. Maybe we need to see how  _ many  _ rounds you can—” 

He grunted, needing to breathe as his own pleasure overwhelmed him. Michael was a tight,  _ hot  _ heat, and having him all strung out for him like this was enough to scramble Alex’s brains. He suddenly thought of how it would look to fuck Michael while he was wearing a thong, or some crotchless panties or… Alex had to close his eyes against his own imagination, but he was already coming, folding over Michael’s back and sinking his teeth into his shoulder blade, marking him up again. 

Michael was whining underneath him, begging. “Please, please, Alex, I need—I need to—fuck—” 

“Easy, easy,” Alex said, post-orgasm slow, as he tipped them onto their sides. He pulled out, holding onto the condom he was wearing to keep it on, and then lubed the plug back up and slid it back into him and turned it on. “Okay, let’s see how many you got in you.” 

Alex held him through three more orgasms, which probably should have been impossible for 17-year-old Michael, much less 28-year-old Michael, and at which point Michael was begging him to stop. Alex did, and Michael’s cock finally went soft, matching his wrung out body. He gulped in air, helplessly, and didn’t even notice as Alex cleaned them both up a bit and released Michael’s wrists from the cuffs. He was proud of Michael for not doing it himself. 

“You’re...amazing, Guerin,” Alex said, spooning up behind him and covering him with all of the blankets. “You doing okay? Did you know you could do that?” 

Michael just groaned and shook his head.

Alex was wondering what set him off: if it was the dominance or just fingering his ass that made him somehow capable of limitless orgasms. “Maria’s gonna love this. Hell, any girl would love this. We’re gonna have to put a padlock on you.” 

Michael made a fussy sound, and rolled over, pressing his face against Alex’s chest. Too tired. Definitely didn’t want to talk. 

“And you didn’t even throw anything with your brain, that time,” Alex realized, looking around the room for anything out of place. Unless you picked the whole damn cabin up and put us down in Oz.” 

Michael chuckled at that, but didn’t say anything. He was trying to listen to the glorious fucking symphony his over-taxed and over-loved body was playing. He wasn’t sure  _ he  _ wasn’t still vibrating, maybe making the whole house vibrate so Alex didn’t even notice.

“Okay,” Alex chuckled, when it became clear Michael wasn’t ready to talk tonight, taking Michael’s hand and kissing it, and then laying it flat over his chest. He rubbed Michael’s back with his other hand, and let Michael curl up and tuck his toes under his leg. “I love you, Michael.”

And Michael was so out of it he didn’t remember saying “I love you,” back. 


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In which our heroes try out some serious kink. 
> 
> Also, I technically posted two chapters yesterday, so there might be a present waiting for you if you hit the "Previous" button!

“Well yeah, sure, an anal orgasm usually means a guy can go again,” Maria said, matter-of-factly, and then held up a hand to forestall any comment. “Look, if you think I’ve never pegged a guy before, think again.” 

“Be that as it—okay, I’m sorry, but my God, we really  _ are  _ the same—” Alex began, shaking his head. “But yeah, this wasn’t that. It was like, four times in an hour, DeLuca.”

“Ah, it must be hard being a man, and thinking that’s a lot,” Maria said with a condescending smile. 

“ _ DeLuca _ ,” Alex said sternly. 

“Anyway, we need more pillows, and more light. I can’t see anything like this.” 

It was a week later, which was the first time they all had an evening free at the same time. They were in Maria’s cluttered bedroom, and Michael was already tied spread-eagle to the bed, naked, on his back, his hips propped up higher than his chest, while Alex and Maria stood over him, fully clothed and bickering like he wasn’t even there. 

And what a week it had been. 

It started the morning after the four orgasms, when Michael had been glad to talk, though he didn’t know anything more than Alex did. 

“And no, we’re  _ not  _ asking Max or Izzy.”

(Which meant Alex and Maria were totally cornering  _ Liz  _ the next chance they got to ask  _ her _ .)

“Let’s talk about how your dollar-store handcuffs helped me keep my TK under control,” Michael suggested. He was making scrambled eggs, moving around Alex’s kitchen a little stiffly, if confidently. 

“They were not from the dollar store, Guerin,” Alex said, sucking down coffee. He was functional in the mornings, but he wasn’t instinctively pleasant, so he had to make an effort. And Michael was worth making an effort for: bundled up in Alex’s sweatpants and Air Force hoodie, shoulders relaxed and looking around the world with interest instead of calculating where the nearest exit was. “You think that was it? Or that you just had other things to worry about?”

Michael laughed and blushed. He was using butter for the pan like he was rationing it, his curls falling into his eyes. “I don’t know, man. All I know is I haven’t made furniture float on accident since I was a preteen. And then, I get with you two, and it’s every time. It’s like, I have this level of control of my powers normally, and then you or Maria kiss me and, like. Blow the lid off.”

Alex smiled softly and nodded, waiting. Michael was usually very forthcoming about these things, given time and space and safety to be. Way more than Alex was himself, he knew. 

“It’s like, when I know  _ you’ve  _ got everything under control, then they’re chill again.” 

By the end of the day, Alex and Maria had donated all the brand new men's underwear they had just bought for Michael and provided him with several pairs of women’s underwear. Some of them had been Maria’s, but most were new and bought to fit him a little better. Many were soft and not that different from briefs, except for the lace and flowers, so he hardly minded, though he was never going to get used to thongs. But Maria and Alex went fucking crazy over the sight of him in women’s underwear, so who was he to complain? Nobody had ever looked at him like that before in his life. 

So that was an easy adjustment to make. He was pretty sure he still had some boxer-briefs hidden away in the Airstream or in his bunker or somewhere, if he ever needed them. 

Perhaps related to the women’s underwear thing, Maria also suggested (ordered) that Michael endure three more humiliations leading up to this moment: 

First, she made him ask Kyle Fucking Valenti where he went for his manscaping. This caused both of them to die a little inside (“How the fuck do you even  _ know  _ what that is, Guerin? Much less—have you been checking me out?” “Ew, no. Liz told Maria who thought it would be funny if she made me ask you about it. I think girls talk about sex a lot.”) before he got the information. 

Second, this led to a spa appointment that Maria set up for both of them, which involved some kind of mankini wax (“Next time you want to hurt me, DeLuca, just spank me again,” Michael suggested), a facial, and mani-pedi. Michael kind of liked the pampering (“Especially after they covered my man bits with wax and pulled out all the hair!!”).

Third, Maria picked up the check, saying it was as much a gift for her as it was for him. Michael was glad he didn’t see how much the total was. 

And that night she had fucked him with a strap-on for the first time, finding that spot inside him that made him seriously crazy levels of horny (“Alex was right about that, Jesus, Guerin.”) and making him come  _ five  _ times that night to her six, like it was a competition between her and Alex. And because she trussed him up in a rope harness that kept his arms tied behind his back, he didn’t break anything with his brain. 

Of course, they didn’t get out of bed until noon the next day, both of them sore as hell. But concept proven. 

And now it was Sunday. The holiest day of the week, according to some. Perfect time to tie your alien boyfriend up and experiment on him with his boyfriend. 

(The  _ final  _ humiliating thing Michael experienced this week was learning what an enema was. Still, probably for the best if they were going to go rooting around in his asshole all afternoon.)

“Help me get this out from under the bed,” Maria grunted, tugging on what turned out to be a huge plastic crate. 

Alex gaped when she opened it. Michael had to crane his neck to look.

“That’s...a lot of fetish gear for one woman.” 

“This is not my first rodeo. Uh,  _ literally _ ,” Maria said. 

That made Alex blush and collapse into laughter. “Maria!”

“Don’t kinkshame me,” Maria laughed. "Anyway, that was only with the Chad."

She reached into the crate and pulled out something seriously sinister-looking. Before anyone could ask, she said, “This is called a speculum.” 

“Oh  _ fuck _ ,” Alex said, and laughed again. “No, but, no, you’re right, that’s exactly what we need. I’m sorry in advance, Michael.”

“Can I just say, for the record,” Michael said, “the next time we want to play alien autopsy, you guys definitely need sexy doctor outfits.” 

“I could always desecrate my uniform if we want to go  _ that  _ direction,” Alex suggested, sitting on the bed and running his hand through Michael’s hair and checking the rope around his wrists. “Hands okay?” 

“My nose itches,” Michael said with a shit-eating grin. “But yes, I’m okay.” 

“Good, because this is not precisely going to feel good,” Maria said, while Alex rubbed his nose. “Remind me to tell you what a pap smear is like.” 

Michael winced, and Alex winced in sympathy, but he helped Maria hitch Michael’s hips up even higher with more pillows (she seemed to have an unending supply). 

“Now we know you’re just humoring us by letting us tie you down, but this is as much for the kink as it is to keep you still...” Alex began. “You safeword if you need to, or just free yourself, but we need you to hold still so you don’t hurt yourself or us. And if you don’t throw anything with your brain while she stretches you out with that thing, we’ve definitely proven the concept.” 

“I got it,” Michael told him, rolling his eyes. “I’ll be good.” 

“He’s got it, Al. Come here and start opening him up for me.” 

All the fingering was nice, at first. The speculum, once inserted, also felt fine, but its job apparently was to stretch him open like the jaws of life, so as she began turning a small screw to open him up, Michael arched off the bed, at least as much as he could, with a loud, “ _ Ow _ .” 

“Easy, baby, just relax for us,” Maria said, adding more lube and waiting for his body to get used to that stretch before stretching him more. 

“It’s gonna feel real good in a minute, you can do this,” Alex said. “Be good for us.” 

“Yeah,” Michael panted, closing his eyes briefly. Good. He liked being good for them, and this was probably the most fun an alien autopsy was ever going to be for him, so he was grateful, really. “I’m fine.” 

The next stretch was definitely a pinching sensation he did not like, but he didn’t say anything, and held his breath. 

“Breathe, Guerin,” Alex said, rubbing a hand up and down his chest. 

Michael sucked in a breath, forcing himself to relax. “Next time we’re saving this for when I do something bad, not just fucking around,” he gasped. 

Maria gave his cock a few tugs in sympathy. “We’re almost there, and then we’re gonna see how many times you can come for us. It’ll be worth it.”

“Unless that hurts, too, eventually,” Alex points out with an evil grin. 

“You have no faith in our boy. I think refractory periods are a human male problem,” Maria purred, sliding her fingers inside (she was wearing gloves, which made this weirdly more hot) and fingering him until he started moaning. 

“Alex, come here,” she said, handing him some gloves. “Keep fingering him.” 

Alex was glad to do as he was told, for now, though a laugh bubbled out of Michael as he groaned and tossed his head. “If you guys get into a fight because there’s too many doms in the bedroom, don’t blame—whoa, fuck!” 

Alex’s fingers got more of a reaction: larger, longer, and not fucking around. Michael’s thighs were trembling and he began to sweat, and this time, when Maria turned the screw to open him up just a little more, plenty big enough for them to see inside, his cry wasn’t quite a cry of pain. 

“Shh,” Maria purred, rubbing his leg. “My mom’s asleep upstairs, baby. Not so loud. You’re doing so good.” 

And then the stroking stopped, as they removed their fingers and hands and literally shone a light up his ass. 

“I mean, that’s probably just a human prostate. I dunno, Maria, you might have looked inside more men’s assholes than I have, apparently,” Alex chuckled lowly.

“Are you calling me a slut?” 

“Believe me, I’m impressed.” 

“Well, it’s probably true. And yeah, that looks normal to me. I still think—”

“Ready to test it?” 

“Yeah. You get him warmed up.” 

Before Michael could ask what was going on at all, Alex’s fingers were back inside him, hooking upwards to massage his prostate, while his other hand was on his dick. Michael moaned and relaxed into it, as much as he had begun to relax from Maria and Alex talking about him. He liked being the center of their attention as much as he liked being what brought them together. If a little bit of ass gaping was all they required, and if they were going to keep touching him like  _ that _ , and keep him tied down like  _ this _ , if they were going to  _ keep  _ him, well… There was nowhere he’d rather be. 

“Okay, so this little guy,” Maria said, holding up a slim wand that looked like it would be a terrible vibrator, “is for targeted vibrations. We’re gonna just hold this right on that—your prostate, or whatever that is—and see if it gets any bigger.”

Michael choked a little. “Uhh. Bigger?” 

“Yeah,” Maria said. “It’s something we both noticed.”

“I mean, you are an alien, Guerin,” Alex said, withdrawing his fingers. “Oh, and you can come whenever you want. As much as you want.” 

“I wasn’t aware I needed your permission,” Michael replied.

“Hm. Weren’t you?” Alex hummed, and Maria cackled and held the wand against his prostate and—

The first orgasm hit him almost immediately, like a punch in the face, or maybe that was just the stripe of his come splashing across his cheek with no warning. 

“Holy shit!” Alex laughed, grabbing a washcloth and wiping Michael’s face. “You okay?” 

“Nngh, fuck,” Michael said, hips arching, toes and fingers splaying, his balls tightening up again as he came  _ again  _ almost immediately. It was like being on the fastest scariest roller coaster of sex-pleasure known to man and probably aliens. So, it was good, but the kind of good that made Michael feel like he was about to pass out. “Fuck, okay, ease up, p-please? Th-that’s…”

Maria drew the wand back out, rubbing his thigh encouragingly. 

“Intense,” Michael said, trying to catch his breath. 

“Good boy,” she said. “Glad you’re expressing your limits.” Then, to Alex: “We don’t want to leave the come on his face? Looks so pretty.”

“I mean, yeah, okay,” Alex agreed. 

“I hate you both,” Michael said, his whole body loose with orgasm—loose enough she could screw open the speculum some more. Michael whined, but he was into this, into the humiliation, at being spread out and helpless like this with come on his face and ass gaping and thighs shaking. 

“How did that feel?” 

“Good? I barely felt anything,” Michael said, overwhelmed, “except it feels good  _ now _ , obviously.” 

“Okay, try again. No way it happens that fast again,” Alex said. “You ready to go again, Michael?”

“Y-yeah,” Michael said, like he was bracing himself. 

That time it took about two minutes, with Michael groaning and sweating beautifully for them, and this third orgasm was somehow no less powerful, no less earth-shattering. He tugged on the restraints and even gave them a few good whoreish moans, but not a single piece of furniture, not a single sock, was thrown about the room. All he did was keep coming on himself, though the amount seemed to be lessening. 

“We should be taking bets on this,” Maria hummed, patting his leg. “How you doing, Michael?” 

“What are you  _ doing  _ to me?” he panted, closing his eyes. 

“Not sure yet.” 

“Experimenting.” 

The next hour of this got three more orgasms out of Michael, and a visibly noticeable change in the size of his prostate. Michael’s pupils were blown wide, and they actually had to clean him up a bit because he was sweating so much he started shivering. 

“You two are terrible scientists,” Michael panted, once Alex gave him some water. “Hypothesis proven,  _ please  _ stop torturing me. You’re going to make me go blind.” 

But he was grinning, and hadn’t used his safeword or as much as tugged on the ropes in some time. If he was going to die here, he seemed very happy to do so. 

“That was only Hypothesis 1,” Maria said. “Does it get bigger the more orgasms you have.” 

“Hypothesis 2 is does it plateau out or just keep getting bigger, and where the fuck is your refractory period. Maybe that's Hypothesis 3. So many questions.” 

“Well, you see, in the ancient days on Antar,” Michael began with sarcastic authority, though his voice sounded a little punch-drunk, maybe like he was doing a David Attenborough impression but couldn’t stop grinning, “the aliens with the most sexual stamina were deemed the strongest by their people, so it became evolutionarily beneficial to be able to orgasm non-fucking-stop. That’s how they picked their leaders, based on...”

“Shut up, or I’ll let Alex put that ball gag he’s been eyeing on you,” Maria teased. 

“I’ll do it, too—I mean, I  _ haven’t  _ been...” 

Maria laughed. “But, okay, let’s change it up a bit. Batteries might be going on this one,” Maria said, as Alex crouched down to look in the toy box. “We’re gonna help you out now, baby.” 

“Oh, good, because I was confused what  _ this  _ was already,” Michael said dazedly. 

They slid a vibrator into him with the speculum still holding him open, and he immediately began to moan and writhe again. The vibrations were less intense this way, but more constant, none of this stopping and starting. And now he was definitely gone, floating somewhere that wasn’t here, at least until Alex ruined it when, “Just to try it out,” Alex put the ball gag on him, careful not to tangle his curls in the buckle. 

“I can still talk with this in, you know,” Michael said, his speech only slightly slurred. Probably no more slurred than it was already.

“Yes, but you sound like you’re wearing a ballgag when you do,” Maria replied. “We could always get something to really shut him up, if you want.” 

“Could we?” Alex asked. He was blushing at how into this he was, and how much Maria knew about it that he didn’t. “At my cabin he can scream all he wants, but here I don’t want him to disturb your—”

“Maria? Do you have a boy over?” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, I'm also conveniently forgetting that Maria took her mom to Sunset Mesa or wherever.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, double-feature because cliffhanger...

“Maria? Do you have a boy over?” 

_ Mimi _ . 

“ _ Shit _ . No, Mama!” Maria said, going slightly pale. 

They froze, Michael swallowing a grunt as the proximity of a parent—even a nice one—killed his arousal instantly. He was already undoing the buckle on the gag and ropes with his telekinesis when Alex laid a hand on him. “Shh. Don’t move.” 

“I’m…changing, Mama, I’ll be right there!” she called through the door, and then turned around. She looked apologetic, half like she’d been woken up from a pleasant dream and didn’t want to be awake, and then like she felt guilty for thinking that. “I’m gonna go make her some tea. You two keep going…” 

Alex shook his head. “No. Look, he’s worn out, and Michael Houdiniing himself out of the ropes is as close to a safeword as he’s ever going to give us.” 

The gag was unbuckled now, and Michael spat it out. “I’m fine, just—” Here he looked at Maria, watching her carefully, assessing, before he spoke. “Maybe we could sneak out the window, and—ah, ah, come to the door?” 

Alex and Maria stared at Michael in surprise. 

“Do you think you can  _ walk _ ?” Alex asked, loosening the ropes, freeing his wrists. 

“You want to come to tea?” Maria asked, and as soon as she said it, eyes hopeful and almost wet, Michael knew it was the right thing to offer. 

“Yeah. Like. I haven’t really—met your mom. I know she’s—but I still want to.” 

“You do?” Maria repeated, looking like she was going to cry.

“You  _ do _ ?” Alex asked. 

“Fucking—” Michael grumbled. He’d really like to be having this conversation with pants on. “You, go make tea. You, untie me.”

“Sorry, okay, hold still, take it easy,” Alex said. 

Maria kissed Micheal, slow and grateful, and he relaxed, everything becoming less urgent. “I love you,” she said, and was gone. 

Alex locked the door behind her, and dealt with the vibrator and speculum— “Hasn’t gotten any bigger,” Alex told him, untying his legs next, “but it’s big, like, if I didn’t watch this grow before my eyes, I’d make you go see a doctor.”

“Yeah, please don’t make me do that. Kyle’s going to get a complex if I only talk to him when you guys make me.” 

Michael groaned as Alex helped him sit up. 

“Okay, take it easy. I’m gonna help you to the bathroom.” 

“I’m fine, Al,” Michael said, smiling. “Just make me presentable enough to meet my girlfriend’s mom.”

“Hey, if she forgets who you are, next time we can tell her you’re  _ my  _ boyfriend,” Alex said. Then he shook himself. “That wasn’t funny.” 

“It’s a little funny,” Michael said, with sympathy, as Alex helped him limp to the adjoining bathroom. After a five minute shit and a five minute shower, he felt better. 

Alex was waiting for him, with clothes. “So my dad didn’t totally ruin you for Meet the Parents?” 

Michael gave Alex a tired smile. “Oh, no, I’m kinda still terrified. I just think—Maria wanted it.” 

Alex drew him into a hug. Michael was a little surprised, stiffening at first before he relaxed into it. “God, Guerin. We really don’t deserve you.” 

…

Having tea with Mama DeLuca in one of her lucid moments transported Alex back in time. He felt young again, happy, carefree, and at home in ways his own home never felt. 

But he had  _ never  _ laughed like this with Mimi DeLuca. 

In a move that neither Maria nor Alex saw coming, Michael was devastatingly charming, and had all of them busting up laughing at his wisecracks and impressions. He didn’t seem tired at all, even after what they put him through, just—just overwhelmingly happy. Alex briefly worried he was just putting this on, like an act, a response to trauma, like he thought he  _ had  _ to be charming so he didn’t get his hand smashed to pieces by a homophobic enraged parent. But the set of Michael’s shoulders said he was relaxed, at home, even as at-home as Alex felt. 

Maybe it was just Mama DeLuca’s magic. 

Alex also hadn’t seen Maria happier than this in a long time. Oh, he’d seen her having fun, happy by some definition, but not like this, so happy down to her core that she could almost cry. She  _ looked  _ ten years younger. 

It wasn’t how Alex had expected to spend the afternoon, but it was wonderful. 

At some point, Mimi insisted on making them dinner, and she didn’t even seem to need any help, though Maria and Alex hovered nearby just in case. Michael offered to help several times, but they wouldn’t even let him up. Which was kind of a shame, because his ass still hurt. 

After dinner, Mimi started asking Michael if he knew WIll Smith, and then asked Alex who he was again, so Maria took her mother upstairs to bed. 

And Michael was still smiling when they were gone, if a bit sadly now, so Alex knew it had been real.

“You know what sucks?” Michael said, and then went silent. Alex was about to prompt him when he finally figured out what he was going to say: “That bad things happen to nice people. I’ve got a line of foster families I’d like to see—like that. But not her. And it makes Maria so sad. Do you feel how sad she is? Is that a psychic thing or an alien thing?”

“I think it’s…I feel it, too,” Alex said, pulling Michael into a hug. His second hug of the day, his second hug from Alex, ever. 

“I just want to make her happy,” Michael said. 

“You do, Michael. I promise you do,” Alex assured him. 

…

When she came back downstairs, Maria caught Michael and Alex doing the dishes. 

“You guys are so sweet,” she said, and not just about the dishes. “That was...that was really great. This afternoon. Thanks. I’m sorry it—”

“No need to thank  _ me _ . This got me out of being tortured all evening,” Michael teased. 

“Which we can resume in a few,” Maria said. “If you were disappointed it was cut short.” 

“You two have fun,” Alex said, drying his hands as the last of the dishes were put away. He kissed Maria’s cheek and then Michael’s lips. “I should get home.” 

“I’m sorry I ruined things,” Maria pouted. 

“Maria, you didn’t ruin things. Mimi didn’t ruin things. We were just talking about what a great night we had,” Alex said, hugging her. Michael slotted himself in behind her. 

She breathed deep, on the edge of tears, once, twice, and then said, “Thank you guys.” 

“Thank  _ you _ ,” Michael said. 

Back in Maria’s bedroom, they had a mess to clean up, and Michael soon had Maria laughing again when he told her “I’m not sure I’ll be able to fart without pooping for like a week,” and they tumbled into bed together just hugging. 

“You’re different, Michael. Something’s different,” she said, running her fingers through his hair. 

“I mean, you kind of overloaded my brain with serotonin. I’m a little worried about the hangover tomorrow. Or about becoming an addict.” 

Maria shrugged. “With you? What’s one more addiction?” 

“Ouch,” Michael said, and cuddled up close, resting his head over Maria’s heart. “I’ve got two suppliers, I guess.”

“Seriously, though, I want you to stay with me or Alex tomorrow,” Maria said. “Subdrop is a thing. Did you have fun today? I mean, playing alien autopsy. We don’t have to do that again if you—”

“No, no, I liked it,” Michael said. “I liked—both of you there. I know it’s not—I know that’s not how this...how our arrangement works, but. I did like that.”

“Mm, noted. What else did you like?” She combed her fingers through his hair, helping him relax even further. 

“Endless orgasms? I’m like renewable fucking energy. I didn’t know I could do that,” he chuckled. “You guys bring amazing things out of me.” 

“You do the same for us. All of us.” 

Michael smiled, already blushing: “I liked you, uh, tying me down. Experimenting on me…I like whenever you guys are interested in me...I guess...” 

Maria giggled. “We’ve a whole toy box to play with. Anything you didn’t like?” 

Michael slid his hands and legs over her smooth skin, just enjoying the feel of her. “I mean the ass-stretcher wasn’t  _ fun _ .”

Maria cackled at that. “Tell me about it. But, okay, we won’t use that again.” 

“And I don’t know what the fuck is with the panties fetish but...well, no I like that.” Michael blinked slowly, near sleep. “But you tell Alex if he wants to gag me he can use his dick next time.” 

“We  _ do  _ know how you like that,” Maria said, and rolled over, tangling their legs together and winding her arms around him. “Michael, can you, uh, do the handprint thing, on me? 

Michael’s eyes popped open. 

“I want—I want you to know how happy you make me. How wonderful I think you are. And maybe I can share some of that excess serotonin so you don’t crash so hard tomorrow.” 

“Not sure that’s how it works,” Michael said, a little nervously. 

“You don’t know, it might. It’s your choice, but I’m asking you. Please?” 

“Yeah, you know I can’t say no...”

“Michael. Yes, you can,” Maria said sternly. 

“I know, I know. I just don’t want to.” Michael splayed his hand over her hip. “I don’t, uh. I don’t know if you’re prepared for all the sappy things I think about you.” 

Maria kissed him. 

“Good. I like surprises.” 


	18. Chapter 18

The psychic connection from the handprint had an odd effect of _magnifying_ the happiness in both their brains, actually, so in effect they laughed and cried each other to sleep, just kissing and whispering, _I love you, I love you,_ over and over. 

And the next morning, Michael still felt _fantastic_ and Maria was happy, too, and neither of them could stop giggling. 

“Alex,” Maria said, getting him on the phone way too early. “Alex, you should probably get over here to make us stop having sex and go, uh, eat something.” 

Alex, on the other line, sounded tired, and vaguely worried, but not at all surprised. Even though no one was watching him, he tried not to smile. “ _Okay_ , twist my arm, I’ll take the day off.”

“Alex—we did the handprint. Don’t be mad. We’re good now but he might subdrop later and I’m worried he might take me with him.”

Alex sighed hugely. He heard, or thought he heard, what he decided was the sound of _licking_ in the background, but he very resolutely did not ask and did not think about it. 

(Sexuality check: yep, still gay.)

“Yes, alright, I’m coming over,” Alex said, annoyed but fond. “Can you two get...I suppose a shower is too much to hope for. Dressed? And call someone to watch the Pony.” 

“Okay, got it....”

Did he just hear her breath hitch?

“I’m glad you’re having fun, but please spare me the soundtrack,” Alex said, shaking his head. “And be decent in half an hour.” 

He hung up before his brain could supply any more of that picture. 

…

Michael might have spent, _literally_ , all day between Maria’s warm thighs, just licking her labia with the flat of his tongue. Not with any immediate intention to make her come, just— _feeling_. 

There was an old mutt one of his foster families had growing up, who lived most of his life on a chain outside, who would just get into a rut of licking his balls just over and over and over. He gave himself a rash at one point, Michael thought he remembered, and he thought it was because he was just so goddamned bored all the time, but he also suspected it felt good, like, if he could do that, who knows, maybe he’d spend all day tonguing his balls, too. 

And now, thanks to the psychic connection he had with Maria, Michael almost thought he _could_ feel it, in a way, through her. Even if it wasn’t ratcheting up to an orgasm, it felt _good_. Since Maria had been to the spa, too, she was porn star smooth down there, which made for a very lickable experience, and he decided it was only fair he kept himself well-groomed, too. 

After a few more phone calls like this, Maria put the phone down. 

“Michael, babe. I know this is good, but we have to stop. Alex is going to be here, soon.” 

Michael kept licking. He was in the _zone_ , man. That old mutt was really relatable now. 

“Michael!” Maria said, and it wasn’t the tug to his hair but the psychic shock that had him lifting his head. 

“Yes, ma’am, ‘m sorry,” he said, grinning and wiping his mouth. He heard her thought even before she could voice it, and answered: “I’ll brush my teeth before Alex gets here.” 

Maria sighed, missing his mouth already, though she had to glare at him when he turned back around like he was going to offer. “Good boy.” 

Ugh, and _that_ felt good, too, because she knew how much she liked having her orders followed and how much he liked following them and now he knew that she liked that he liked and this was very overwhelming. She stepped past him into her shower, not even worried about not getting her hair wet if she wasn’t going anywhere for the day. 

When Alex arrived, they were in the kitchen, and Michael was making pancakes for breakfast. 

“Turns out he loves cooking,” Maria told Alex. “Did you know that?” 

“I...did not.” 

Michael flashed him an utterly irresistible grin. He was wearing comfortable-looking sweats slung low enough that Alex could see some very pink panties underneath, because he was shirtless except for the apron printed with sunflowers. 

“Well no wonder you can’t stop fucking him,” Alex told Maria, which made all of them burst into laughter. 

…

It was a little like drunk babysitting, making sure they both drank water and looking after them like they were idiots when they were like this. It wasn’t like Alex hadn’t done this for Maria before (and not like she hadn't drunk babysat _him_ before), and he sort of guessed no one had ever drunk babysat Michael ever, so. It still beat working. 

Back in Maria’s room, Maria had sobered enough for a more or less serious conversation. 

“We should debrief from yesterday,” Alex began. “And Maria, you tell me if he’s telling the truth.” 

“Got it,” Maria said, though she squirmed in her seat while Michael licked his lips.

Alex was so far beyond being grossed out by this that he just laughed. “Okay, let’s start with the sobering question. Any hard nos from last night?” 

Michael shook his head, but Maria shrugged. “It is hard to tell. He likes some of the things he doesn’t like because we like them, and he likes others because he wants to suffer for us. Like the painful stuff. Pain is complicated. I think he genuinely likes being humiliated, though.”

Michael was blushing, so that must have been near to the mark. “If I _liked_ it, it wouldn’t work as humiliation,” Michael defended. “Technically. But I like that it works. For me, and for you.” 

“Fair,” Alex said, nodding. “And the bondage?” 

“Oh, fuck yeah!” Maria and Michael actually said that together, illustrating how in sync they were. 

Alex laughed, surprised. “Okay, so like a—” 

“A fetish need,” Maria said. 

“You’re supposed to be in _his_ head, not mine,” Alex said. “And that’s about the control, right? Not about the physical restraint, necessarily.” 

“Right. He can move things with his brain. Being _able to_ but not being _allowed to_ is a big deal, I guess. Letting us be in control,” Maria said. 

“ _Trusting_ you to be in control,” Michael corrected, quietly. 

“Anything else he wants?” Alex asked Maria directly this time, since it was easier. 

“I think I—we—thought up another roleplay scenario he’d be into,” Maria said, giggling, but she was quiet on that for now. “More 24/7 things, like the panties. So he can feel owned all the time.”

“Well, we might as well start a fetish shopping list, then,” Alex said with a huff, his own cheeks coloring a little as Michael’s desires were laid bare, hotter than anything he could have dreamed up in a manic pixie dream boyfriend. “And I think I know how we’ll bring you back up slowly.”

…

It was like acclimating, Alex explained, and Maria agreed. Not stopping the kinky play cold turkey, but easing him off. They rummaged through Maria's toy chest, determining what they had and what they wanted, and finally settled on what Michael would wear for the rest of the day. Maria owned a few small anal plugs, but these were the kind for chicks, with the fake jeweled base. 

"Straight people are so weird," Alex couldn't stop himself from saying, and Maria actually agreed with him. On the other hand, the sparkle of a blue gemstone that could be seen through Michael's sheer pink panties was...pretty cute. So cute, in fact, that Maria dressed him in one of her long, flowing skirts, so she could check out his ass any time she wanted. 

Maria and Michael giggled about it, but that was where Alex drew the line. 

"You'd make a very pretty girl, and that's the problem," he said, making a face, which made Maria and Michael burst into a gigglefit again. 

"Still gay, huh?" Maria asked, and Michael could tell she was secretly a little disappointed. 

Alex gave her a long-suffering, but slightly longing, sigh. "Still gay. Also he's probably going to get precome all over this."

"That's fine," Maria said, and squeezed Michael's ass.

"Ugh. Fine," Alex said, but he was biting his lip to keep from grinning. 

They also took this opportunity for Maria to teach Alex some of the shibari that she knew, tying Michael's arms behind his back in a loose harness, comfortable for extended wear. Over this went a sweatshirt, the arms hanging loose, in case they were interrupted, and to keep Michael warm. 

But this was the extent of the erotics, as they turned on Disney plus and just cuddled up to watch kids movies. 

"This is going to have some weird Pavlovian effect on me," Michael suggested, his head resting in Maria's lap. "Where kids movies get weirdly associated with kinky shit."

Alex smiled and patted Michael's hip, thinking maybe he didn't mind the skirt so much after all. "Ideally, you'll get to a point where you associate _everything_ with kinky shit, and one or both of us. I wouldn’t mind you being edged a little bit all the time. You know, with that alien stamina, I bet you can maintain an erection for longer than the prescribed four hours..."

Michael laughed, blushing. He was utterly comfortable here, feeling safe in his own skin, safe between the two of them. 

"You'd like that, wouldn't you?" Maria asked, pulling some hair out of Michael's face. 

Michael let out a shuddering breath, sounding both totally certain and cautiously curious. " _Yeah_?" 

"Good boy."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How about that 2x1 premiere, amiright? This fic is dedicated to Michael saying he just wants to be good for someone 😭 ~~and also my dissertation stress~~
> 
> I've also decided to wrap the current story here and switch to a Series model, though I already have more written so don't worry!! Alex and Maria sharing a ~~submissive~~ boyfriend will continue! Just subscribe to the "No 'I' in Threesome" Series. 
> 
> Shout out to the [RNM18+ Discord](https://discord.gg/fzKeVt), and Angsty aliens, ninhursag, mythras_fire, JoCarthage, kbl55429, CamilleMadeAnAccount, sp-ac-ep-re-si-de-nt (TheQueenOfStars), larenoz, and castielcampbell for your comments and support! Thanks for reading!


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